Bring You Home
by LiaGrace
Summary: People don't change, they simply adapt and modify themselves as a way of hiding their flaws and Lia Carisi was never supposed to be a victim, someone who needed saving. As her older brother, Sonny never thought he'd be put in the place where he had to convince her that being a victim didn't mean she was broken. Warning - Domestic Violence
1. Chapter 1

**Here I am with a new fic!**

 **This fic is focused on Sonny and his sister, Lia who I swapped out Bella for as I wanted to have my own character and I'm totally feeling the love for Lia so she's not going anywhere!  
**

 **This deals with the heavy and important topic of domestic violence so please please reach out if you need to. I've tried to keep Lia as realistic as possible throughout all of this and at some points she may be a tough character to understand, but I'm doing it all for the right reasons I promise.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or it's characters, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

 **/ _'When someone isn't treating you right, no matter how much you love them, you've got to love yourself more and walk away'_ /**

Carisi sighed as he climbed yet another flight of stairs and came another floor closer to his younger sisters dorm room. He very well knew the conversation to come wasn't going to be an easy one and he dreaded the thought of it. Lia was the youngest of the four siblings' and she was the one he'd always gotten on with the most. Gina and Teresa had gone through their fair share of issues, and Lia had always seemed to have everything held together.

But even as the most sensible, she was incredibly harsh on herself and that was something his two other sisters had never understood. Their parents hadn't either and had never been able to push or support Lia in the right way.

She'd taken that to heart.

Making his way down the hallway of her floor, he found himself smirking at the state of the place, the stained carpet and noise that echoed out from each closed door was definitely not Lia's scene. She had however, spent one night in her first month of college convincing him that it was now considered home. She was now in her third month of her chosen course and he'd hardly heard from her. She was the girl who used to call him every few days to ask about his day and tell him about hers.

It was his mother who had called him the previous day, expressing her concern about her youngest daughter, who'd perhaps become a little too involved with her first boyfriend.

He had been charming, spoken at the right times and smiled, but there was a look in his eye that Carisi's mother hadn't liked. The way he gripped her daughter's hand a little too tightly, told jokes about Lia that embarrassed her.

He's just like that mom. I don't mind. It's all for the right reasons. He loves me, he told me.

Do you just not want me to be happy at all now? Because he makes me happy.

Lia's plan for life had been perfectly constructed since she was young and there was absolutely no room for mishaps. That however, was before she'd fallen in love with Dan and perhaps, chipped the pretty china teacup that she was on her way down.

He looked up from his thoughts to notice a brunette struggling with a stack of books and for a moment he was taken aback, thinking it was Lia, only realising it wasn't when she smiled at him, eyelashes fluttering at him from behind her glasses.

Distracted by his presence, the textbook at the top of her pile slipped to the floor and as she juggled with the rest, he quickly bent to pick it up, and passed it to her with a polite smile of his own.

She eyed him for a moment before speaking, "Lia's brother right? I'm in the room next to her and well she's a closed book, talks more about her family then herself."

The girl laughed as he nodded. "Yeah, I'm her big brother. She's room 47 right?" He continued the conversation and the girl turned back down the hall.

"Yup. Haven't seen her much lately though."

"That's why I'm here. You know anything about her boyfriend?" He asked quietly, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets.

"Dan Houghton. He's a pretty boy, popular… A bit older than her I think… Charming fellow, but looks can be deceiving." She shrugged and looked at the floor.

"She could just be busy with her course work, she takes it really seriously. On that note, I best be off, I have a ton of my own work to finish."

"Thanks for your help." Carisi smiled, despite the small amount of dread forming in the pit of his stomach.

"You're welcome, the name's Chloe, by the way." She gave another grin before stalking off down the hallway and with a shake of his head, he continued on toward room 47.

With a knock on the door, he leant against the frame using the time to figure out something to say. It was a sensitive subject, and one that he'd become rather acquainted within his time at SVU. The number of victims he'd talked to echoed through his mind as he tried to remember the words he'd spoken to them, sincerely. This however, was his baby sister and that changed everything.

Nothing seemed sincere enough.

The door opened quickly and he stood up straight as Lia glared at him from her place inside the safety of her room.

"Mom called you." She stated numbly and before he had the chance to speak she cut him off abruptly. "I'm busy, and I'm fine."

"What, so I can't visit my little sister anymore?" He tried and with an eye roll, the 18 year old stepped aside, and held the door for him.

"How's work then?" She asked as she shut the door and locked it behind them.

"Same old. How's the college life treating you?" He moved a small stack of books off her desk chair and didn't miss the glare she shot his way as he sat down.

"Like I said, I'm really busy and I have someone coming over this afternoon, so…" She trailed off and any idea of conversation Carisi had thought of had long disappeared.

"Lia, you know why I'm here, and I can't help you unless you talk to me. Mom called me the other night, said you had a boyfriend, Dan? she had a bad feeling about. Do you want to tell me about that?"

Lia shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest defensively, "What do you want me to say Sonny? Nothing has ever been good enough you know? I shouldn't have to spend every second of my life trying to live up to their expectations, or lack of, and for your information, Dan's great and I was just with him this morning."

She was with him that morning and from what she'd just said, it sounded as if he was visiting again that afternoon. Carisi sighed, "Your friend Chloe said she hadn't seen you in a while." He stated quietly and the girl blanched.

"None of your business."

"You're my baby sister, so technically it is my business." She glared at him with wide eyes at that, and he'd quickly realised this was proving more difficult then he'd first expected.

"Tell me about this, Dan, then? I thought the prince was supposed to come after the career?" He asked with an encouraging smile.

"Plan's change." She spoke curtly and after watching Carisi's expression turn to one of quiet frustration she sank to a sitting position and absentmindedly refolded the blanket at the end of her bed, smoothing out every little crease. "Dan, is great. He's like my best friend, and I'd do anything for him. I honestly think I love him." She paused and looked away. "We were talking about our relationship the other day and decided we're going to move into a small apartment after I'm finished with this semester. So we can see each other more often. He works now and well, I'm here… He told me he wants to start a family with me, that he wants to get married."

Lia glanced up and for a split second, she reminded Carisi of the eight year old girl who'd come into his room one afternoon to tell him all about the prince she wanted to sweep her off her feet. How he had to be handsome and kind and have a good heart.

The fact, Dan had pushed her right off her feet she was clearly oblivious to; simply seeing stars from the fall.

"Are you sure that's what you want to do?" He asked simply, trying not to anger her too much.

"Nothing's ever good enough for you is it? Or Mom, or Dad?" She snapped and stood, pacing the length of the room.

"I'm not saying that Lia. I'm just thinking that you should talk to someone about this."

"Mom?" She laughed and then continued, "Teresa and Gina don't want to know about me, they're too busy with their own 'perfect' lives to hear about mine."

"I'm here now, Lia." He pressed and she ran a hand through her hair, "I'm not gonna leave until you sit down and talk this through with me."

"I'm scared okay?" She cracked, and for a moment Carisi thought she was going to tell him everything that they all suspected but with a shake of her head she spoke in a quieter tone.

"I just don't know what to do, you know? I thought I'd made the wrong decision coming here… I had it all planned out and I just started doubting it and myself."

"Lia, if you need help, with anything, all you have to do is ask" He reached forward to take her hand.

"No it's okay. Dan told me that it will work out, that when we're married it'll all be okay. He said that whatever happens, he'll be there for me and I trust that."

"You don't trust me?" Carisi raised an eyebrow, slightly hurt. Lia went red and spoke in a dismissive tone.

"You should go. I need to clean and stuff. Dan's coming over later, and he hates it when it's messy. It wasn't up to my own standards this morning, so I want it to be perfect."

Carisi stood and quietly cast an eye around the small dorm room. It hardly looked like anyone was living in it. Aside from the books, a pencil case and her laptop that were sitting at her desk it was lacking any kind of personality. That very well may have been the way that Dan liked her, without her serious and witty personality, but simply for her body. It disgusted him and he'd seen it time and time again, even in his short time at SVU. He wanted to fix the situation, make sure his sister was okay, but he knew he couldn't. Lia had to want help, for whatever was going on.

She tugged her sleeves over her hands nervously and cleared her throat as she made her way toward the door.

"Lia…"

"Please go. I don't need your help, and I don't need saving. I'm no victim."

It came close to breaking his heart as he took a step toward the door and when he noticed his little sister was on the brink of tears he instinctively pulled her into a hug.

She didn't hug him back at first, seemingly surprised at his actions but when she finally did, she didn't move for a minute and despite the visit feeling like it had done more harm than good, he was glad she was able to accept some act of comfort even if she hadn't wanted to.

After realising what she'd done, she pulled away and focused on opening the door and in the nature that Carisi didn't really want to leave, she didn't particularly want him to go.

"Promise you'll call?" He asked and she gave a small nod before glancing up at him.

"Maybe that's a bad idea. I mean Dan told me he want us to create our own family... We went to Mom and Dad's for the weekend a while back and they didn't get on. He and Dad got into a fight and we had to leave early."

She shut her eyes for a moment, as Carisi spoke, his words cutting dangerously close to her heart.

"This isn't about Dan, Lia. This is about you. Please, promise you'll call."

Lia sighed. "I'll call you." After another moment she added, "I promise."

Still less than satisfied with her answer, he finally moved out the door into the hallway.

"Take care of yourself Lia." He said sincerely as she shut the door. He didn't miss what sounded like his sister crying on the other side of door and with a heavy heart and nothing more he felt he could do in that moment, he retreated back to the stairs.

 **I have no idea what to expect from writing this and all I can tell you is that I'm having an absolute blast doing it!**

 **Let me know your thoughts below in a review. I'm half heartily taking requests. I already have a lot of this written but If I can fit something in, I'll go there.**

 **What do you all think about Lia so far?**

 **Will have the next chapter up in the next week**

 **Cheers,**

 **Liv, x**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the love, and here's the next chapter.**

 **A/N: I'm trying to keep this realistic, not romantic as there's nothing pretty about violence.**

 **Cheers for my two lovely reviewers!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

 **Drop your thoughts in a review at the end**

Lia cried, with a hand over her mouth to muffle her sobs. Hoping her brother wasn't lingering outside her door. She was mostly angry at herself. For everything. She knew deep down it was her fault when Dan got mad, that she just needed to get everything right. He seemed to get everything right for her. It was only fair. She thought he was her perfect prince to begin with. Smiling and holding each and every door for her. He'd been kind and loving and it seemed she had only blinked when everything changed.

The smiles were still there, but they were different. They came after cruel words and gripping hands. Every compliment had been taken back, but Lia was too proud to admit that something was wrong and besides, no one was there to believe her.

So it was her fault and she settled on the idea that she just wasn't good enough. She had to try harder and do everything better. Because even if it seemed hard now, it wasn't the end and she couldn't let it just fall apart.

Running her hands over her face she forced herself to take a breath and when the tears had finally stopped, she started cleaning. Positioning every single thing in the room perfectly, remaking her bed and wiping down all visible surfaces.

It calmed her, distracted her for a while, until everything was clean but her. Her mind was a mess, torn in two. Her thoughts were messy and any act of trying to tidy went amiss. Then she thought back to the promise she'd made Sonny and gave a sigh, sitting down on the carpet in the middle of the room. As much as she wanted to call him, all she felt like doing was proving to him and the rest of her family that she could do this.

Because if she couldn't, what was the point? Of any of it?

 **X**

Carisi absentmindely passed a box of tissues to a mother, who was sitting in the chair next to his desk, waiting for her daughter. She'd started crying after talking about how she should have seen the signs.

He to felt like he should have seen the signs. This was his job. He read the signs for a living, yet he'd been too busy to notice.

"I should have known. I'm her mother for God's sake." The woman said again after blowing her nose and Carisi shook his head, forcing himself to look at her tired, sad face.

"Mrs. Jacobs, it's like a rehearsed script, it's hard to detect you know. In this case, we're lucky and Josie will be okay…" He started and after a moment she nodded, throwing the tissue in the rubbish and taking a deep breath.

"I think I want to go be with her now."

He smiled slightly and watched as she moved toward the conference room. Leaning back in his chair, he thought back to the conversation he'd had with his Mother the other day.

"One of the women were talking about it at my book club. How men abuse their wives and you'd not know about it. I'm worried about her Sonny. He seemed charming, but there was something about him… You'll talk to her won't you? She always listened to you."

Lia had never been close to their parents, or their other sister's. She prefered doing things on her own and there were times where that brought her absolute misery. Yet still, she took it. She always would. He had no idea how to help someone who'd always managed to help themselves time and time again.

Amanda's voice pulled him from his thoughts as she returned to her desk, "That was tough, poor girl. Doesn't want to go through pressing charges either. They always think it's an accident, that their man loves them and it'll never happen again."

"It always does." He sighed and after a nod, she sat down and the two worked in silence before she piped up again.

"How was visiting your sister?" When he glanced at her she raised an eyebrow, "Nick mentioned it this morning."

"Yeah, she's going through a rough patch. Fallen head over heels for an older guy. Told me they were moving in together, that they want to get married and start a family."

Amanda chuckled, "Oh to be young again. First serious boyfriend? It's probably nothing to worry about."

Carisi went quiet and nodded. It could just be a phase and perhaps the 19 year old who'd always been so unbearingly hard on herself had simply arrived at college and let go.

He wanted to believe it, he really did and went about the rest of his day trying to convince himself that Lia was not like Josie; battered and beaten in more ways than one.

 **X**

Lia had perfected the skill of covering bruises. Mostly from the constant under eye bags that she had been cursed with since a young age.

Dan didn't mean to. She told herself time and time again as she grabbed her mascara and applied a few coats. Every couple had something and perhaps this was just their thing.

Accidents were normal, and she, things, would be okay.

It was her own fault. She swiped a pink lipstick over her lips and sighed at her reflection.

She'd mentioned her brother over dinner one night, and how he was a NYPD detective in the Special Victims divison and it was a stupid mistake.

But she'd slipped. It was a mistake and she found herself hating her older brother in that moment for all of it, for suggesting that Dan…

She wasn't being abused. She wasn't weak. She wasn't a victim.

She was in love, loved. No one understood how much he meant to her

Her brother's concerns was disregarded and as she moved away from her small mirror, she gave a tiny smile as an idea sprung to mind.

If Sonny were to meet Dan, perhaps he'd believe her, what a good guy he was. Because he was and he loved her.

Throwing her hair back over her shoulder, she picked up her books and left the dorm room. Everything would be okay when she'd talked to Dan, explained herself.

She would apologise and he would tell her that he loved her. It was simple.

She'd done it before.

 **X**

A promise had meant everything to Lia when she'd been younger and no matter how big or small it had been, she always kept them

She had to call him, and when she did the next day, Carisi was surprised and even more so when he noted the cheery tone of voice.

"Dan wants to meet you. Can you do this afternoon, for coffee?" She chirped and he felt his eyebrows furrow together.

"I don't know, Lia…" He trailed off. Honestly, he had no idea what to think.

"Please…" Her voice had lost it's happy tone and he knew he couldn't say no.

"Okay, fine. Just let me know where." It was then that he was glad it seemed to be a quiet day at work. He'd be able to go out for an hour and everything would be fine.

Maybe he would even like the guy. Perhaps nothing was as it seemed and he really was the charming prince Lia had described. He really might love his sister and want to marry her.

But there was a feeling he couldn't shake.

"Uh, I'll text you the address. It's a little coffee shop Dan loves."

That didn't mean Lia liked it. Dan did. But he didn't say anything about that.

"I'll be there." He said before she bid him goodbye and hung up, ending the conversation. It was mere minutes later that she texted it through and with that, he placed his phone back on his desk and hurried to finish the report Olivia was expecting.

It was several hours later, when he was finally standing, having already finished several cups of coffee. He wasn't in the mood for any more.

Making his way towards Olivia's office, he sighed and thumbed through one of the reports, making sure everything was in its place.

The door was closed, and he pushed it open to find the Seargent on the phone. She held a hand up to him, asking him to wait a minute, and he checked his watch.

2.56pm.

He was to meet the perfect couple at half three. Meaning at this stage he was going to be early. Olivia hung up the phone then and glanced at him with a saddened expression.

"I have those reports…" He started as a prompt and she nodded, giving him a grateful smile when he handed them to her.

"That was Mercy hospital. Josie's just been brought into the ER."

"I thought Ray was in custody?" He asked quickly.

"She didn't want to press charges in the end. Said it was an accident."

"Oh." He muttered and he thought about Lia. Had whatever he'd done or said to her been called an accident too?

Stressed, he ran a hand over his hair, knowing what was to come.

"Amanda and Nick are out. Why don't you come with me to the hospital."

"Sure." He said, watching as she stood and pulled her jacket on. "I'll just make a phone call…" He trailed off until she spoke.

"Make it in the car. I'll drive." She suggested and he gave a nod, moving back to his own desk to grab his jacket.

He couldn't help but feel like he was letting Lia down. If he didn't go through with this and hold his word how was she meant to trust him? What would happen to her if he didn't turn up? He didn't want to think about that, but he had to.

Lia picked up on her end almost instantly, and she almost could have guessed it was bad news. But she was hopeful, as always that it would work out for the best.

"Hey Lia, I'm real sorry, but something's come up at work so I won't make it for coffee."

She didn't speak for a moment, but the dejected voice of his younger sister troubled him. "Oh. Well okay. I'm sure they need you, so I'll talk to you later."

He went to reply and tell her how sorry he really was, and while he was trying to conjure up something decent to say, she hung up and he was stuck listening to an insistent beeping that signalled the end of the call.

Eventually he pocketed his phone with a sigh, capturing Olivia's attention.

"That your sister?" She asked conversationally and he gave a nod.

"Yeah. I was meant to meet her and her… boyfriend... this afternoon."

"You don't like him?" She made a left hand turn and glanced over at him after straightening up.

"Never meet the guy. Our parents think there's something else going on." Carisi almost felt the need to go check on her at the end of his shift, but knew that him doing so had the potential to make the situation even worse.

"You think it's an abusive relationship?"

He didn't say anything to that. He didn't need to, but those words made it real. The man could be abusing his sister, with Lia powerless, or feeling it.

Because how do you accept that the person who's your everything is taking everything away from you?

Lia had seen Dan mad before, they'd fought before. But this was different. They were in public, he had a family reputation to hold.

He was seething. It was a quiet kind of anger, where Lia could feel the raging heat coming off his body as she tried to make it right.

It was her fault and she knew it. Again, her own anger flared up at the thought of her brother, who'd cancelled on the two of them. It was her fault.

"Good first impression." Dan muttered and with a small smile, she touched his arm.

"His work's important. That has to mean something."

"It means nothing." He spat, and turned away from her before straightening his tie.

"Well it's my fault, I mean I should have expected this… Blame me…" She tried, but he still looked out at the street rather than her.

"I do blame you. I should have expected you to let me down." Dan quipped finally facing her, eyes narrow and his mouth pressed into a tight line. "You're lucky we're not at home." He threatened, only forcing a smile on his face when a passerby walked a little to close to the pair.

"I'm sorry." Lia said quietly, struggling not to burst into tears.

"Oh like you mean it. I have to go, it's been a hard day at work and they, need me."

Lia didn't dare ask for a ride back to college.

That would be ungrateful, the time he'd taken out of his eventful day had already been ruined by her.

"Okay." She squeaked and he gave her another glance.

"That colour doesn't suit you, you know?" He said in a soft tone, and watched as she glanced down at her black and white outfit before turning and hurrying down the street, leaving Lia standing by herself, watching after him.

And in that moment, it began to rain.

 **I added a bit more to the end of this chapter then I had originally planned, so you're welcome!**

 **I'm really enjoying writing this and it's really out of character for me to spend several hours each night furiously typing.**

 **Also please let me know if you like my writing style? It's developed a lot from my previous SVU fic, 'Fragile Ghosts'!**

 **Let me know your thoughts, and/or any little requests.**

 **Thanks for reading,**  
 **Liv x**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the love on the previous chapter!  
**

 **Huge thanks to scarletcoin2012 for your review that means heaps as is what I was aiming for in writing this!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

 **Please let me know your thoughts in a review at the end!**

She walked until she lost track of time. Hoping the rain would wash away every hint of guilt she felt, but it merely continued to wash over her.

At the quiet anger she had against her brother, Lia surprised herself when she ended up on his street. The apartment building he lived in was nice, modest and Lia felt a pang of jealousy when she realised that her brother's life had turned out for the better despite him not really seeming to try.

It wasn't fair.

But neither was bringing him into her problems.

The stairs to his apartment seemed daunting and by the time she got to his door she was exhausted. Mentally and physically. She stood there for a moment while she regained some of her dignity and then she knocked.

Softly at first, and then louder, and when the door swung open, her fists were near numb.

"Lia?" He asked, even more surprised than herself that she was there. However he didn't waste any time and quickly ushered her inside his apartment, shutting the door behind her before she had the chance to bolt back out.

To start with, she didn't say anything and neither did he.

"Are you okay?" He checked and she nodded, her eyes cast toward the floor.

"You're soaked, do you want a shower?" He asked, but to Lia, that would be a burden and she placed a hand on her hip, trying to stop it from shaking.

"No it's okay." She whispered. She longed to feel the burn of the steaming water, but she continued to shake her head.

It was bad enough she'd turned up here. She should have simply gone back to her dorm room.

"I don't know why I'm here." She admitted. For a moment, after catching a glimpse at the concerned, pained expression on Sonny's face she contemplated sitting down and telling him about Dan.

Not just about the pretty red roses he'd given her on their first date but how he'd pulled them apart on their fifth.

He had seemed charming. He had seemed perfect and Lia didn't know what he saw in her because she'd seen everything in him.

There was nothing of her in the beauty of roses, but lately she was beginning to see more and more of herself in the memory of the crushed petals and snapped stems.

Damaged.

But their relationship wasn't there yet and she was still determined to fix it before it got there.

She just had to try harder. Dan deserved that from her.

But how do you keep something alive when it's drowning in thirst?

"Lia?" He brother's voice snapped her out of the trance she'd fallen into and as her eyes focused on her surrounding's she realised she was now sitting on his couch.

"Mmm." Lia mumbled, her mind trying to string together what had happened.

"Go have a shower, do you want dinner? You look like you haven't eaten in a week."

She still didn't understand what had happened.

"It's okay. I'm on a diet… Dan's idea… We go running together on Saturday's…" Again, she spoke in a mumble. Now both cold and tired. She'd always loved her brother's cooking, but nothing apart from sleep appealed to her in the present moment.

Lia didn't want to fight though, so she stood shakily and made off in the direction of the bathroom.

"I'll grab you something of mine to wear for now." Carisi called, caught up in watching his sister. Something wasn't right and he didn't know if it was the cold, the rain or lack of eating, but she no longer seemed like his sister.

He came back a moment later, with a shirt and pair of sweatpants he knew had no hope of fitting her.

Lia took them with a small, "thank you" and then retreated into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her and it was a moment later that he heard the shower start.

Taking a deep breath, Lia undressed, and avoiding looking at herself in the mirror hopped in under the steaming water.

Not wanting to take too long, she merely let the water wash over her for a few minutes before turning it off.

Towelling herself dry, she pulled on the clothing her brother had given her, only to find that as expected, the sweat pants fell straight off her.

Had she really lost that much weight?

With a tired sigh, she refolded them and finally glanced at herself in the mirror, and at the sight, she almost broke into tears.

She looked tired, with shadows under her eyes and there was a sickly paleness to her skin. But there was also a bruise, on her temple and on her cheekbone.

It had been a mistake. She knew that. He wanted to have sex and she didn't. She knew better than that and had angered him.

It was easier to stay quiet. She knew that.

Her brother wouldn't. He'd see straight through whatever she told him and that thought kept her locked in the bathroom for several more minutes as she fretted over what to do.

Lia was only broken out of her nervous trance when there was a knock on the door.

"You okay in there?" She heard him call and with a sharp inhale she replied with a small yes.

After another short moment of staring her reflection down she turned and made her way over to the door and pulled it open.

"The pants didn't fit by the way." She laughed lightly as she returned to the living area and avoided any eye contact.

It was the first thing he noticed.

"Tell me about your work. What's your new team like?" She almost instantly asked, sitting in the chair furtherst away from her brother as possible.

He noticed that too.

"Well I'm the new guy, but the job's great. Tough, but rewarding." He spoke truthfully, despite the fact that the only thing that sounded rewarding in that moment was punching the sense into Dan Houghton.

"That's good." She smiled before speaking again quickly. "Dan's working under his father at the moment, being prepared to take over the company. It makes him so happy."

"What about your happiness?" He quipped, but she already had an answer to that question.

"If Dan's happy, I'm happy." Lia smiled again and the fakeness of it made Carisi want to get up and shake the sense of it.

He crossed one leg over the other instead. "Was he happy when he hit you?"

"What? He… He would never… Never do that. Why an earth would you say that?" She stammered before giving a small laugh.

"Where'd you get the bruises on your face then?"

He waited for the excuses, and when they came he shut his eyes.

"I hit my head getting out of bed…"

"What about the bruise on your leg?" He got up from where he was sitting to move next to her and she flinched as he sat back down and looked away from his seemingly prying eyes.

"Corner of the desk. Stupid huh?"

Carisi struggled to find something to say and Lia seemed to pick up on this as a little bit of confidence returned.

"I'm really tired. Do you mind if I crash on your couch tonight?"

Lia minded, a great deal. But sleeping on the couch was better than calling Dan and having to ask him to pick her up at this time of night.

"Of course I don't mind. You can take my bed if you want, I can sleep on the couch."

She shook her head quickly. "No it's okay. The couch is fine."

She didn't want to argue. She just wanted to sleep. Wanted it to be morning, so she could leave.

Carisi didn't want to argue either, but he also didn't want her to leave. As he grabbed her a blanket and a couple of pillows he thought back to his parents, and then he thought of Josie.

Who'd missed her chance and paid for it. Who had stayed and who was now lying in a hospital bed. He couldn't have that happen to his sister.

He'd never forgive himself if that happened to her. But he simply didn't know what to say to her.

Moving back out to his sister, she glanced up with a small smile, and the light bounced off the dark purple bruise on her temple. He sighed knowing that in that moment anything he had to say would only be met with defensive remarks.

So he left it.

"You sure you don't want the bed?" He checked, but she quickly shook her head, reaching up and grabbing the blanket and pillow off him.

"Nope. I'll be okay." She gave another smile, and God her smile.

He'd never seen her smile so much before and the fact it wasn't even out of happiness but rather, lies saddened him.

He didn't know what to do and it was in that moment that he admitted it, to himself. He didn't know how to help someone who didn't want it.

Lia didn't manage to fall asleep till near 3 in the morning and it was at that point where she regretted all of it. College, Dan, letting her brother get involved. She should have left when she had the chance.

She also couldn't define what she meant by that.

 **x**

Lia woke the next morning, with very little idea of where she was, until she sat up and saw she had several texts and missed calls on her phone.

"Damn." She muttered as she picked up her phone and lay back against the pillow.

Almost all the texts were Dan, with the other being from Chloe, asking if she was okay.

With a sigh, she ignored them and went into her call log.

 _Dan_

 _Dan_

 _Dan_

They were all from the man she loved and instead of calling him back in that exact moment she bit her lip.

Was he still angry at her? She very much wanted to call him, and tell him that she was sorry and that she loved him. But how was she to explain that she was lying on her brother's couch after staying there the night.

Her brother was the reason behind their last fight, she didn't want it to be the start of another.

It was a burden, all of it and with another sigh, she clicked on his number and held the phone to her ear.

The dial tone had only just started beeping when she was startled by a door opening and she quickly hung up and dropped her phone.

"Sorry, was I interrupting?" She heard her brother ask and with a shaky breath she shook her head.

"No, no it's fine."

"You want coffee?" He checked on his way past, heading toward the kitchen and she laughed.

"Of course."

Before getting up to follow him, she sent Dan a quick text, asking if he could pick her up. She would save the apology until she saw him.

They talked and had a breakfast of french toast and too much coffee and Lia talked about college and her classes and didn't mention Dan once.

It was an hour later when after calming down after a fit of giggles, Lia asked if he was meant to be going to work.

"It's okay, I called the Sarge and told her I'd be in later this morning. I can drop you back at college if you want."

Lia gave a small nod before draining the last of her second coffee.

"I'll go get changed then."

He watched her walk away and it was as she had her back turned that

She remembered.

She had texted Dan.

Proved how much she relied on him. Stopping in her tracks, she shut her eyes tightly before turning back around.

"Actually, Dan said he would pick me up soon."

Carisi's face fell slightly at that so she looked at the floor instead.

This wasn't part of the plan. She was stupid and she had screwed it all up. Every micro moment of her high and mighty plan to self satisfaction had been destroyed. Somehow she'd still managed to convince herself she was satisfied with that.

But she wasn't; it was never enough.

"Okay." He replied, but he'd turned his back on her to do the dishes.

She picked up her phone to text Dan the address and then she got changed.

Back into the clothes Dan hated.

She looked at herself in the bathroom mirror and not only did she hate her clothing, she hated herself too.

The rest of the time spent at her brother's apartment was awkward. He answered calls from work and she sat on the couch, staring at her knees.

A harsh knock on the door made her sit upright, and she quickly pulled the blanket she had draped over herself and folded it over the back of the couch.

She bet Carisi to the door by a split second, and pulled it open to come face to face with Dan.

"Hey." Lia spoke first and after a second, potentially after realising they had company he gave a smile and ignoring Lia, held a hand out for Carisi to shake.

"Dan Houghton, pleasure to meet you." He cast a cheery smile and Carisi hated him. He had an air of charm and he could see how Lia fell for him, how he swept her off her feet.

"Dominick Carisi. So you're the one my sister can't shut up about." He joked lightly and didn't miss Dan's eyes flash to Lia warningly.

She looked at the ground, but was the first to speak again.

"We should go. You'll have a busy day and Sonny has to get to work."

Dan gave an almost smug nod and Lia hurried out to stand behind him, where she could avoid any look her brother was trying to shoot her.

He let her go, and spent the rest of the day trying to remember her smile, but the only thing that replayed over and over in his head were the bruises on her face and the way Dan took her away.

 **I'm loving writing this story so I hope you enjoy it as much as me!**

 **I haven't seen too many fics like this and I wanted to read one - So I wrote it :)**

 **It's writing exactly how I wanted to read it!**

 **Let me know your thoughts in a review**

 **Thanks for reading,  
Liv x**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here's chapter four!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

 **Warning: A hint or rape.**

 **Let me know your thoughts in a review at the end!**

 _Lia apologised. Over and over during the car ride and it was only when they pulled away from a red light that she realised they were going a different way, in the opposite direction to her college._

 _She didn't ask where they were going, but he told her._

" _I have a surprise for you. You'll love it." He gave a smile and reached over to hold her hand._

 _He wasn't looking at her when he smiled, but he never had been._

 _They crawled through the typical morning New York traffic until they turned into a more suburban looking street, with tidy apartment building's sitting behind white picket fences._

 _He pulled up outside one and put the car in park before getting out, obviously waiting for her to follow suit._

" _It's beautiful." Lia commented as she came to stand next to him, looking up at the brick building._

" _My father owns it. I explained our situation and he gave one of the aparments. On his own suggestion."_

 _Lia paused and looked at the ground, knowing very well that there had to be a catch. But it would be worth it, because they were._

" _Oh yeah?" She questioned, and followed Dan toward the building's front door, watching as he keyed in a security pin and opened the door._

 _He answered as she caught the door before it had a chance to shut in her face._

" _He wants you to leave college. We can start a family and be happy, you know. I'm the head of this household and I'm the one that works, brings in the income."_

" _You want me to be a house wife?" She was hurt by the suggestion. College had meant everything to her, to her own family and she didn't know what was worth throwing it all away._

" _Don't say it like that." Dan thought she was being ungrateful so she gave a small smile as the elevator doors opened._

" _I can't wait to see it, and I'll think about college, okay? It's not that easy for me." At the silence Lia bit her lip uneasily. As the elevator climbed to the top floor of the building she thought back to her morning with her brother and gave a sad sigh. There had been no fear, of doing or saying anything wrong. She didn't want to admit what it was like with Dan, even to herself._

" _I'll make it easy for you. It's already been taken care of."_

" _What?" Lia's voice cracked, it was over._

" _Our family lawyer took care of it. You're going to be a Houghton now."_

 _The smug tone of his voice should have cued the warning bells in her head, but it didn't. He wanted her, wanted to be with her for the rest of his life._

 _Out of every girl who'd thrown themselves at him, he'd chosen her._

 _Noone had ever wanted that before, she couldn't let this one go, even if it cost her everything she'd wanted._

 _The loft apartment was beautiful, and Lia couldn't deny that she could see herself living in it. It was their apartment and she loved it. Dan showed her the living area, and the kitchen, the bathroom and finally the bedroom._

 _He caught a hold of her shoulders from where he came up behind her._

" _Do you like it?" He whispered in her ear and hiding a flinch, she gave a nod._

" _Of course. It's lovely, the whole thing…"_

 _Pulling her round to face him, his grip on her tightened and her breath hitched. "Now that I've made you happy, I think it's time for you to do the same, yeah?"_

 _She didn't dare say no. That would be ungrateful._

 _He left her, lying in the bed unaware of the tears that brimmed at the surface. He told her he had to go to work and he left her without a second thought._

 _Finally, after hearing him leave she got up and made her way toward the bathroom and there, Lia cast an eye at herself in the reflection, a towel now wrapped around her small body. She didn't remove it, terrified at what she'd see._

 _Turning away from herself, she moved in under the shower, wincing when it hit her tired and bruised body._

 _She couldn't keep living like this, deep down she let that thought linger as she conditioned her hair. There was something that drew her to it however, and it seemed pathetic. But growing up, nothing had never been good enough for her, no matter what she'd achieved. Now she was here and the challenge of their relationship was something she loved, that she thrived on._

 _It was going to be fine. All of it. It would turn around for the better and when that finally happened, she'd look back on this moment and laugh about it._

 _It was weeks later that she finally plucked up the courage to tell her brother. She'd both missed and avoided several calls over that time from him and after one morning, of listening to all of his voicemails she decided it was time._

 _Dan had mellowed out since they'd moved in together and she finally felt like things were on the right track. She missed college, and burying herself in her textbooks for hours at a time but there was something peaceful about being alone and she didn't mind it._

 _Little did she know there was a difference between being alone, and isolation._

 _She didn't have a car, and didn't want to bother Dan in asking for a ride so that Tuesday morning she woke early and after a shower and quick breakfast she left the apartment._

 _The subway had never been Lia's favourite mode of transportation, after getting on the wrong one when she was 13, but today she did it anyway. She had to._

 _There was no time for self celebration._

 _It was crowded, and the lack of space in the carriage only added to her anxiety, but she found a slightly less empty area in the corner, and stood there, breathing quickly for the entirety of the ride._

 _At the first stop they pulled up at, she tugged out her earphones, and began blasting one of her playlists in her ears, blocking out the noise of the busy morning commute._

 _It was a while later that they arrived at the correct stop that she made sure to check multiple times along her journey. She headed in the direction of the restroom and cringing at the state of it, splashed some cold water on her face before carrying on her way._

 _The November weather was dismal, grey clouds and cold, light rain that showed no sign of stopping. Lia didn't mind however, as the sharp coldness helped keep her mind clear._

 _Lia walked quickly, ducking round other people and the growing amount of puddles on the footpath. It was when she came to stand in front of the precinct that she realised the seriousness of what she was about to do. It wasn't just about herself anymore._

 _Did her brother even want to see her? What if he didn't?_

 _Heavy raindrops were finally what drove her inside and she made her way through the security check as a nervous wreck. The guard who passed her a visitors badge seemed to have guessed as to why she was there and in her silence, he told her that the Special Victims Unit was on the seventh floor._

 _After a polite smile and small nod, Lia wished she had corrected him, but moved in the direction of the elevator anyway, her hands now shaking considerably._

 _Letting someone out first, she quickly moved into the elevator before she backed out and hit the button for the seventh floor and stepped back to watch the floor numbers climb._

 _From her eventual place in the hallway she could see through the glass door, into the bullpen however, there was no sign of her brother. For a while she merely paced back and forth, her mind moving too quickly for her to decide what to do. An officer moved through, talking loudly into his phone and in his hurry, bumped into her. Lia flinched and struggled to force a smile on her face as he gave her an apologetic wave of his hand. He turned down another corner and with that she moved toward the door and pushed it open. Lia was thankful for the chatter in the squad room and the fact no one seemed to notice her at first._

 _Taking a step inside, she found herself in front of a Sergeant's desk. She had black hair pulled into a bun and glasses attached to a chain around her neck. Not someone she wanted to mess with. The woman looked up and gave her a tight smile before speaking._

" _Can I help you, sweetheart?"_

 _Lia blinked at the question. She didn't look like she needed help, did she? She wasn't a victim and with that confirming thought in her head she nodded._

" _I'm here to see my brother, Detective Carisi. Is he in?" Lia glanced in the direction of the desk's, and thought she picked him out, with his back to her, but waited for the Sargeant to respond._

" _He just got back in, over there." She pointed to the figure Lia had picked out before turning her attention back to her notepad and picking up her phone_

 _That seemed to be Lia's cue to head over and giving a small sigh she slowly made her way over, seeming to be drawing more attention to herself by the minute._

 _A blonde haired detective glanced up from her laptop, and two others paused in their conversation to notice her._

 _Did they think she was a victim too?_

 _Making a beeline for her brother's desk and past the prying eyes, she cleared her throat._

" _Hey Sonny." She greeted quietly and he spun around in his chair to look at her, clearly surprised to actually see her in person._

" _What happened?" He asked instantly as he stood._

 _Shaking her head Lia smiled and he raised an eyebrow._

 _He hoped she was here to tell him that she'd ended things with Dan._

 _The smile told him otherwise, but he clung to that small amount of hope._

" _I have some news…" She shrugged, before looking up at him and meeting his eye._

 _It was then as he offered her a seat that he noticed she was wearing her hair differently, and dressed differently._

 _Dan._

 _He knew._

 _She sat down and crossed her right leg over her left before folding her arms and biting her lip._

" _What's up then?" He asked, watching her carefully._

" _Um. Dan and I moved in together." Lia paused before adding, "And I decided to quit college, for now." Her hopeful expression almost angered him. College and her perfect life had always been her dream and she seemed okay about the whole thing, just being destroyed._

 _He wanted to mention that but he settled on, "What are you doing instead, then?"_

 _With a shrug Lia looked away._

 _He knew she didn't know. Dan had backed her into a corner and she didn't know what way to run, or how to fight for that matter._

 _He didn't know how to help her._

" _Everything okay?" Olivia questioned as she walked past, having been talking to Nick about Josie's case. She paused next to his desk, behind the chair Lia was sitting in._

 _Lia stared at him as he addressed his Sargeant with a smile._

" _Fine. This is my little sister, Lia." Forced to turn and face the woman, she gave a small smile, and kept her gaze focused on the wall behind her._

 _Lia noticed a sign on domestic violence._

 _The ground was more appealing._

 _She shouldn't have come._

 _Suddenly feeling a wave of panic wash over her, she felt like she needed to leave, or just get out, away from all the concerned, prying eyes._

 _She needed t but she had to hold it together._

" _I should go." She whispered, under her breath and sensed that Olivia gave her brother some sort of look as he grabbed a hold of her arm._

 _Pulling it out of his reach, she wore a hurt expression he wished he could take away._

 _The idea of Dan hitting her plauged his mind, and with that he managed to try again._

" _At least let me take you out for lunch?" Her face instantly told him the answer._

 _Lia didn't know what to think, or say for that matter. If Dan even found out she was here, she would wear it the next day._

 _She either had to cross that bridge when she came to it or she had to burn this bridge right where she stood._

 _Neither were what she wanted and she ran a hand over her face before shaking her head._

 _Lia couldn't meet his eye._

" _Don't make me choose." Carisi thought he heard her whisper and that was when she finally glanced up._

" _I'm really sorry, I'm meeting another friend shortly… So yeah." She stammered and the uneasy tapping of her foot told him otherwise._

 _He had to let her go._

 _She stood and looked at the floor_

 _He couldn't help her if she didn't want it. She had to want it._

 _She accepted the hug he offered as he too, stood and then he was forced to watch her walk out of the squad room, without looking back and it was one of the hardest things he'd ever done._

 _He silently willed her to turn around, and come back._

 _He wanted to help her and instead, she walked out the door._

 **I'm really enjoying writing this story and am quite a bit further into it from here hence the update.**

 **So if you want the next one - You need to review so I know you want it!**

Five ish reviews for the next chapter - Feel free to go back and let me know your thoughts on chapter 3 as I didn't get a lot of feedback on that!

 **That's all for now**

 **Thanks for reading,  
** **Liv x**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks for the love on chapter 4, it means a lot!**

 **Cheers to the kind person who had a whinge - All I wanted was some feedback so you can take your bad vibes elsewhere!**

 **Also I'm super embarrassed about the formatting on the previous chapter - Whoops. Ignore that, this one's back to normal.**

 **I have the rest of this story planned out till the end scene so make sure to let me know anything ya want to read!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or any of its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work**

 **Enjoy x**

Lia arrived back at their apartment several hours later, numb. The conversation with her brother, albeit short, replayed over and over in her mind and she hated herself for what she'd done and said.

Pulling out her set of keys, she was surprised to find the front door unlocked and as she entered the loft, she noticed an opened 12 pack of beer on the kitchen bench.

Dan was home early.

That meant something had gone wrong in his day too, and that meant her day was going to go from bad to worse, but she could take it, because she owed him everything.

"Lia, that you?" He yelled in a slur and instead of turning and walking straight back out of the apartment, she smoothed her hair down and moved closer to his voice.

"Where the fuck were you?" Dan came around the corner, an empty, crushed can in his hand. He moved past her to throw it in the rubbish can and crack open a new one.

"I was out meeting a friend." Lia spoke softly and he scoffed. She would do anything to prove her loyalty to him and make him realise that he was what she wanted.

"What friend? You weren't with another man were you?" She swallowed as he moved back closer to her.

"Chloe, I was with Chloe."

Lia knew he couldn't remember who that was in the current moment, and she gave a tiny exhale in relief as he nodded.

"That girl from you dorm?" He asked and at her nod he continued. "I don't want you seeing her. She had opinions bigger than herself. You don't need that kind of shit forced down your throat."

"Of course. Rough day at work?" She didn't miss a beat in the conversation and went about, setting her bag down and taking off her boots and coat.

"Yeah. Decided to come home early. An order from overseas got mixed up at the docks, so one of our construction sites is going to behind by months."

They moved closer to one another and while Lia could smell the alcohol on his lips he frowned at her.

"If you were with this Chloe… Why do you smell like men's cologne?"

Her expression and lack of words seemed to tell him what he wanted to hear and he chugged down some of his beer before placing it on the table next to him and taking a step closer to her, towering over her.

She didn't want to let herself, but as he raised a hand she regretted it all and felt that maybe if she'd listened to her mother, or her brother. After all, he dealt with this kind of thing for a living and was still willing to help her.

Contradicting thoughts tripped over themselves in her mind and eventually settled on her last hope. Lia couldn't let herself give everything up without one last try, she couldn't be the failure she'd spent her entire life avoiding.

"I wasn't, I promise. I love you…" She tried but his mind was made up and tears made there way down her cheeks.

Lia had never been a person to cry in front of other people and she hated herself for doing it in front of Dan, for showing weakness when all he needed was for her to show him how strong she was. How much fight she had in her.

Dan slapped her then, hard across the side of the face and in shock, her tears stopped and her hand moved to the stinging, red mark on her face. He gave a smirk as she cowered in front of him and he grabbed her arms, shoving her backward until her back came into contact with the wall. She knew what was coming, and at that point she also knew that she couldn't take it.

In that moment she made the decision to let it happen and Lia groaned as he felt her up roughly and at her cries he growled and hit her again, his knuckles connecting with her ribs. causing her to double over against him.

In that moment she wished that she was back standing in front of her brother's work that morning and she paused, wanting nothing more than to take back what she'd said.

She didn't know if Sonny could ever forgive her at that point. She hardly had it in her to forgive herself.

Lia could hardly breathe and even in her vulnerable position, she knew what she needed to do for him and holding back sobs, her own hands found their way to his belt buckle. His touches roughened, and his kisses moved from her lips to her neck and collarbone.

They moved as one over to the doorway of their bedroom and trying to forget the days events, Lia allowed herself to be dragged over to the bed, by a drunk and far too eager Dan.

Some things just weren't worth fighting for, Lia knew she had to let him have this one. One side, one person in the relationship couldn't win every battle and she went down without argument. She was tired, and Dan was drunk.

He'd apologize that evening, or in the morning.

She wasn't worth fighting for, but Dan was.

That was complete and utter crap and she knew it but she still refused to acknowledge that it hadn't gotten any better. Maybe it came down to pride or perhaps Lia didn't think she was worth believing. She'd ignored all of Sonny's attempts to help and she couldn't bring herself to crawl back there.

If Lia were to tell either of her sisters about the sex her and Dan had she knew they wouldn't believe her. They'd laugh. Gina and Teresa had never been on the same page as her. Lia had always been one step ahead in her maturity and in that, she'd grown up, way faster then she'd realised at the time.

There had been no drunken, high school loves for Lia. It had been books, top grades and more study.

Things had changed and she didn't think she minded.

It was a while later, that they lay together under the covers and she shut her eyes, feeling his hot breath on her neck.

"I love you Lia." He murmured and she gave a small smile.

He still loved her.

She was torn.

"I love you too." She whispered.

If she gave in and admitted the reality of the situation to herself, she would never never forgive herself, and she couldn't live with that. Couldn't settle for what seemed like the easy way out.

It felt like giving up, and Lia had never been a quitter.

 **X**

Concentration didn't come easy for Carisi for the rest of his Tuesday shift and he spent the entirety of the time wishing he said more, and wondering how he could have made her stay. He knew he could ask Liv how to help her and she would have the answers, but for some reason he simply couldn't do it.

Perhaps in the same way Lia herself didn't know how to ask for help.

"Thinking bout' your sister?" Amanda's voice pulled him from his thoughts and his sigh in response told her the answer.

"Yeah, can't stop." He admitted and she offered a smile before lowering the lid of her laptop.

"It's hard, complicated family situations. I've had my fair share of experiences with that… My sister was in an 'abusive' relationship for a while."

He hid his shock in a question. "What happened?"

Amanda gave a light laugh. "I shot him."

"Oh."

"Yeah like I said. Complicated. But every family's complicated in it's own, deranged way right?"

"Sure, sure. She just doesn't seem like my little sister anymore."

"How far into this relationship has she gotten?"

"She's jumped in the deep end. Dropped out of college, moved in with him."

"That was fast." She mused and he nodded, leaning back in his chair.

"It seems like only yesterday that she was the girl calling me up from her first party asking for me to come pick her up early." Carisi laughed at the memory.

 _He could hardly hear her over the trashy music, and he could still sense her annoyance._

 _"I knew I shouldn't have come." She commented in a snarky tone, grumbling at his laugh._

 _He'd just worked a double shift as an officer, and it was the night before that she'd asked him if she should go._

 _It was a party being held by a senior, and as a sophomore, it was her first. Parties had never been her scene, and normally it was hard enough to drag her away from her books and in his surprise he'd told her to go for it._

 _She'd still seemed unsure, and after Gina and Teresa teasing her and showering her in a handful of condoms Lia had been near distraught. Sonny had eventually convinced her to go, and promised that she could call if she wanted him to pick her up at any time._

 _Lia had lasted a little under two hours before making the call._

 _She hated every second of it, and despite going bright red at her sisters' advice, there was a condom in her back pocket._

 _It had been half an hour before hiding in the corner had failed her and a junior, from the football team had approached her, running his eyes up and down her in a way that made her grimace._

 _Before she called her brother, she'd made it through an awkward make out session, been dragged onto the make shift dance floor and had fruit punch sloshed down her front._

 _She sat outside on the footpath after calling Sonny and as promised, he pulled up not too long later, looking positively exhausted. Even so, he laughed as he saw her, until she started crying and then he'd given her a hug and they'd gone out for late night pancakes._

 _"Never again." Lia told him as she sipped at a milkshake and her reaction had made him shake his head, trying to hold back his laughs._

 _"It can't have been that bad Lia." He'd countered and she cringed._

 _"Yeah. It was worse." Then she smirked and moved to pull something out of her back pocket. "Remind me to give this back to Gina." She laughed herself, as one of the waitresses glanced their way and she shoved the small square packet back into her pocket._

In that moment, Sonny knew why she was his favourite sister.

There was no denying that.

His laugh quickly turned into a sad smile, and it dawned on him how much he missed her. His little sister.

With that thought in his mind, he stood and made his way toward Liv's office, knocking on the door before entering.

Liv looked up from the file she was reading and gave a small smile, taking of her glasses.

Carisi took that as his cue to sit, and he sighed before speaking.

"I need to know how to help her."

 **If you didn't get the hint - The flashback scene was in italics and that was my favourite scene to write! So let me know if you want more of that!**

 **I was kind of worried about writing Sonny, but the more I do it, the more I love it.**

 **Keep the reviews coming, it lets me know you want more!**

 **Feedback is incredibly helpful (;**

 **Love ya,**

 **Liv x**


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's chapter 6 which is a little shorter - But short and sweet! Well not really sweet, but you know...**

 **I would have put this up earlier but I've had a super busy and exciting week.**

 **I am currently writing furiously toward the end of this story so remember to drop any requests you have before it's too late.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or any of its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work**

Several weeks later after advising Carisi on what to do about his sister, Liv received a call from an officer, who sounded both tired and annoyed.

She too, was tired and at the end of her shift, she didn't particularly want to deal with the start of another case, but that was the job.

"We got a vic here at Mercy hospital, in a right state, my superviser told me to call you guys in."

"She was sexually assaulted?" Liv checked and the man grumbled something.

"Looks like a domestic. Been fighting with the doctor since we got here. I'll leave her for you to deal with."

"Do you have a name?" From the officer's description, Liv knew it was probably going to be a difficult one, and one of the detectives would have a tough job of asking her to press charges.

"No. I'll leave that for you. She wanted nothing to do with my female partner. No point in me trying."

Liv half heartedly thanked him before he hung up and rubbing a hand over her face she moved to the doorway.

She didn't even think of Lia.

Nick and Amanda glanced over at her and stood, just as Carisi moved back into the squad room from the break room and they all waited for the case she was about to mention.

"Nick, go home. Rollins, Carisi, head to Mercy, we have a possible domestic violence vic in the ER. No name, as she's been arguing with one or all of the doctors."

The three detectives quickly made their way toward the door and after making it outside, Nick headed in the direction of his own car, glad to be able to go home, as he was due to fly out to California the next day to see Zara and talk to Maria. Amanda and Sonny headed toward her car, grateful to be out of the office following a long day of paperwork.

It didn't take long to arrive at Mercy hospital, as even with a steady stream of traffic and pulling in to the emergency room car park, they left the comfortable heat of the car and moved toward the sliding doors at the entrance of the building.

The waiting room was pretty quiet for a Thursday night and the nurse at the receptionist's desk stood as they approached it.

"You're here to talk to our 'Jane Doe' then, detectives?" Amanda replied as Carisi found himself distracted by a figure standing on the other side of the room, talking loudly into his phone.

"How is she?" Amanda's voice asked then and he momentarily heard part of the nurses answer, as she checked her patient file in front of her.

"Concussion… Bruising… Sprained arm."

He almost thought that the person was Dan, and he squinted to get a better look, until the man moved out of his sight, gesturing with his hands as he left.

Brought back to the present by the nurse leading them over to an exam room, he quickly followed after Amanda who stopped outside the door, letting the nurse go in first.

A moment later she reappeared, her eyebrows raised.

"She's a fiesty one. Good luck detectives." She offered a smile before moving back over to her desk where she immediately found herself picking up the ringing phone. Leaving Amanda and Carisi to enter the room.

Carisi followed Amanda inside and firstly found himself looking toward the scowling doctor who was checking their pager. The young woman on the bed was the last thing he noticed, and it was Amanda who'd stopped dead in her tracks that told him something was wrong.

Then did he realise that their Jane Doe, was in fact his sister.

Lia.

It had been Dan in the waiting room and it took everything he had not to run back out there and find him. But he didn't, for his sister. She needed him more than he needed to go after the man who'd put her in the hospital.

"What the hell, Sonny? I told you not to call the cops!" She snapped and the doctor gave the two of them a shrug before hurrying back out into the ER.

"Well we're here now, Lia." Amanda started, stepping closer, Carisi following suit and when Amanda stopped at the foot of the bed, he moved to sit on the stall next to her.

He let Amanda do the talking as he stared, in shock at his baby sister.

She had a split lip, what looked to be a black eye and he could see her nose had been bleeding.

"What happened?" He finally asked, unable to get much more out. Besides, he didn't want her to think he was putting the blame straight on Dan.

"I tripped, you know going down the stairs. I was going to go for a run, and I was midway down the stairs when I realised I'd left my phone in the apartment. I turned to go back and get it and tripped on my shoelace. Which was stupid. I was so lucky Dan arrived home early."

He sighed. If he questioned her, Lia would only get defensive and then they'd get no where.

Amanda cleared her throat then and he glanced up at her.

"You should call Liv. You can't be involved in this, you know."

At her pointed look he nodded. "Yeah. On it."

He was family. It wasn't his place to investigate. It was his job to convince Lia she was worth more then Dan was treating her.

Standing, he moved back out into the hallway and was just pulling out his phone to call the Sarge when he caught sight of Dan, pacing in the waiting room, reading something on his own phone.

Calling Liv could wait and with that, he disregarded all the fairytale details Lia had given him and strided over to the dark haired man who looked up in surprise when he saw him.

"Nice to see you again, Sonny." He greeted holding out his arm for a handshake and Carisi couldn't help himself.

"You hit her. My little sister." He yelled, throwing him backward into the wall.

Dan gave a smug look. "She fell down the stairs. Ask her."

His quipped eyebrow made Carisi's blood boil and the fact Lia fell for every single one of his lies made him even angrier.

"This wasn't the first time, was it?" He snarled, and Dan raised his hands, finally shoving the detective off him and dusting off his suit.

"You got nothing. Tell Lia I've gone back to work."

He wanted to hit him, square in the face but at that moment, Amanda was at his side, a hand on his arm.

"He's not worth it." She said softly and shaking of her grip he turned and walked away and Amanda didn't follow him until she'd watched Dan leave.

"Wish you could shoot him now?" She muttered under her breath as she caught up with Carisi who simply raised an eyebrow at her.

If only.

It was Amanda who ended up calling in Liv, who although on her way home, said she'd be there shortly.

Carisi decided to try and talk to Lia again, thinking that maybe with just the two of them she'd be more inclinded to tell him what had happened.

She glared at him as he knocked on the door and entered the room.

"Seriously, this is so over the top, I'm fine. I don't know why you're here. I'm no victim, okay?" She ranted and he let her finish, taking the time to move over and sit on the bed, in a position that made it hard for her to avoid him.

"This wasn't the first time Lia, and it won't be the last. I know you don't want to tell me. You don't want to let Dan down, but don't kid yourself either, you want to do the right thing here."

"You just can't leave it alone can you?" She folded her arms over her chest, hardly wincing at her bandaged arm. When he didn't reply she looked away.

They sat in silence for a moment, and finally she snapped, tears brimming and threatening to spill over, "It was my fault." He was taken aback by her comment and she eventually elaborated. "It was my fault, I know that. He was home early and I hadn't had time to finish dinner, or the cleaning and it had been a tough day at work for him…"

"Stop making excuses for him Lia. Violence is never the answer, and over something so small, even if it was a bad day, you never hit a women."

"It was my fault." She tried again in a small voice.

At the shake of his head she frowned. "Where is he now, I want to see him, okay."

"He had to leave, said he had work."

Lia's face fell so fast it damn near broke his heart, and she was completely torn. Nothing had gotten better since moving in with Dan, she knew that. But she loved him, because he told her that he loved her.

Sonny knew she was heartbroken over Dan leaving and he thought what he was saying was getting through to her, but even so he was surprised at her next words.

"Can I stay with you tonight?"

 **Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed**

 **Again, 5 reviews for an update.**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


	7. Chapter 7

**So sorry for the long wait! I had a lack of motivation and then I was away, but here is chapter 7!**

 **There is a pretty wacky dream scene in this, I wrote that late at night.**

 **Let me know your thoughts in a review**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or any of its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

Lia promised the three detectives she would think seriously about her relationship with Dan and after signing her release papers and being helped into a pair of scrubs one of the nurses gave her she was ready to leave.

"Are you sure I can stay at yours? She checked again as they moved toward the exit and Sonny put his arm around his sister's shoulder in an act of comfort, but she felt nothing, she didn't let herself.

Until something snapped in her head and suddenly she was back, somewhere she'd lived through many times before. She remembered Dan's hands on her shoulders, lightly at first in a way that forced her to look into his eyes, and then they tightened, his nails digging into her skin. His voice echoed in her ear, muffled threats that washed over her mind.

"Lia." His voice cut through the haze like a gunshot and she trembled, shutting her eyes tightly, as the bullet cut through any sense of self worth she still held againt herself.

The harsh voice of Dan morphed into that of her older brother, who upon opening her eyes, she noticed the look of concern on his face.

"Lia." His voice was soft and she faltered, unsure of how to react and now aware that she'd stopped in the middle of the carpark. He was meant to be angry at her, he was meant to hate her for putting him through all of this. Her life had been tidy, with everything, every dream and every failure swept tidily into its place. She had been friendly with all them, and then she'd fallen in love. All of those dreams and failures and memories had been smashed with a fist who'd never felt the power of any of them. They'd swirled together in a kalidescope of glass. Dreams were scattered and memories disregarded.

Inside jokes and arguments had become one. It was painful, every piece of who she was, felt changed and she couldn't do a thing about it.

"Sorry." Lia eventually muttered, eyes burning with tears and she felt completely pathetic.

She could see the glass, the memories of her family and what her life used to be swimming in the pools in her eyes. Her life used to be okay, everything in order and exactly where she wanted it. Do well in school, go to college, start a career, settle into life and herself, become successful, find her true love and start a family.

Things had changed.

The roses Dan gave her wouldn't come back from their death and neither would she and maybe she was past saving.

The drive back to her brother's was mostly silent, and she spent the entire time huddled in the back seat, avoiding catching her brother looking at her in the mirror.

Lia was nearly asleep as they pulled up, but she refused to accept any help out of the car, and stumbled after Sonny toward the building, not missing the glances he kept shooting her over his shoulder.

He had his guest bedroom set up for her this time and had asked Amanda to help him put together some clothing and other necessities for his sister, should she need to stay for a few days at some point. He wanted to feel prepared and this time he felt it.

He didn't think she would fight him so much and that's what made what already seemed hard, a hundred times more.

Lia wanted to scream. She wanted to cry and yell and break things, but mostly she felt like screaming into a pillow. The way her brother was trying to help her smothered her and she was so so tired, of fighting.

She felt like she could sleep for a hundred years.

She didn't want to fight, so she sat down at waited for him to start speaking, and telling her what to do. How he wanted her to leave Dan.

But he didn't suggest that once.

"Mom and Dad fought a lot when you were home didn't they?" He asked and his question caught her off guard.

"I guess. You weren't…"

"There, I know." Sonny looked down before sighing and continuing with what he felt was the best course of action. Lia looked exhausted, and he needed to make sure he didn't scare her off before she either went to bed or walked out the door.

"Did Dad ever hit Mom?" He tried and Lia's brow furrowed.

"No… But,"

"Do you think it would be okay if he did?"

"I guess not." She spoke softly and he could tell her mind was ticking away, and trying to work out where he was taking this.

"Has Dan ever hit you?"

Lia went silent, and she knew not saying anything made him think the worst so she shrugged, "I…" She felt tears burning and she muttered a curse word under her breath, moving a hand to rub her eyes.

"You're worth so much more than that Lia."

"He needs to take it out on someone at the moment andd why can't you just let this be my pain? Everyone has something they don't talk about and this is mine. I'm okay with that. He has a hard job you know, and if I just try harder, we'll get through this."

"How many times have you said that to yourself? How many times are you prepared to tell yourself that?"

"Stop it." Lia snapped, and pulled her knees to her chest, hugging them to her.

"Pain is just a place Lia, it doesn't have to be a destination."

"I give up, okay. I don't want to fight anymore. Happy now?" Lia stood and moved away from him and toward the door.

"Lia, sit down and lets just talk this through."

"Fuck you. It's too late for that now anyway."

He did his best to ignore her anger and spoke again.

"Lia, I want to help you."

"I don't care anymore. I just don't. I've screwed up so bad. My whole life is just… Messed up and I don't care. If I can make his life a little better? I'm okay with that. If that's all I can do then so be it."

"Just as you want Dan to be happy, Lia I want you to be happy." He tried a smile and regretted it immediately, when his little sister literally crumpled on the floor in front of him.

He hurried to her side and was completely taken back by her sudden change in attitude, but still managed to put his arms around her as she started to sob.

"I don't want any of this." She got out between breaths and she hated herself, for being so weak but she was so tired and just wanted everything to be over.

"Lia, honey talk to me." Her cries didn't stop and for a moment he thought she'd missed what he said, but he didn't care. Because this time his sister was crying in his arms rather then alone on the bathroom floor.

"I try… So hard and it's just never good enough." It killed Lia to be so honest, and she didn't want to admit how screwed up the situation was, but she had to. For herself. Her sobs lessened and she managed to slow her breathing and as she did, she sighed and looked at the floor. Her brother went to brush the hair out of her eyes and he didn't miss it when she flinched away. Lia gave an apologetic smile which quickly faded at his next question.

"How often does he hit you Lia?" He spoke softly and Lia knew it was in a way where she could choose to ignore it if she wanted.

She stayed quiet for a moment, before leaning her head against his shoulder and deciding to answer "every few nights. I mean most of the time I can sense it coming and… Distract him."

He guessed it before she said it. "He, he said he wanted kids, but a week after we moved in together he made me go on the pill."

Lia fell silent after that for a while the two simply sat there on the floor, until she finally spoke again. "It's screwed up, and I know I should leave, but I just can't. Not yet."

"Just don't wait too long Lia." Sonny sighed, rubbing her back.

"Yeah. I'm super tired and have a massive headache so do you mind if I go to sleep now? I don't mind taking the couch."

"No, no I have the guest bedroom set up for you. The blonde detective you saw tonight, Amanda helped me get some clothing and stuff put together for you too. You can stay as long as you need."

"I don't want to be a burden." She muttered and rubbed at her eyes.

"You're my sister, not a burden Lia." Sonny stood then and offered a hand to help her up and she reached up with her good arm, allowing him to haul her to her feet.

He walked with her to the door of the bedroom and she gave him another hug before opening the door.

"Thank you, Sonny. I'll see you in the morning okay." She said softly and he nodded.

"We can talk about all of this then. If you need anything, you know where to find me."

"Okay, night." She hovered in the doorway for another moment before moving inside, shutting the door behind her.

With a tired sigh, Sonny ignored the fact he felt like a beer and he to, headed toward his bedroom.

Lia was so, so grateful and she sat on the bed for a while with her head in her hands. Everyone was trying to make her life a better place for her and the fact she didn't know she wanted it killed her.

It was a battle she knew would eventually catch up to her, but it was one she didn't want to fight at that time.

Sleep came surprisingly easy for her considering the night she'd had and it was right before she fell asleep that she came to the realisation that Dan hadn't had any reason to hit her. She didn't deserve it and maybe she was worth more than that.

 **X**

She heard it, there was something breathing behind the closed door and with a hitch in her breath, she stood and padded toward it both curiosity and panic burning her chest. The door swung open before her hand touched the cool metal of the handle and she took a shaky step back as she came face to face with a deer.

Confused, she stared at it as it shook its head, making a snuffling noise against her now outstretched hand as if it were trying to tell her something.

 _Run?_

Something changed in an instant and suddenly blood was coating its fur, dripping onto the wooden floor from its chest. It pooled and spread towards her bare feet in a rush. Lia's eyes then moved from the red liquid back to its face. The pain in the animals eye was evident and as it fell to its knees in defeat, she shot into a sitting position in her bed.

Sweaty and panting, she ran a hand over her face as she heaved, struggling to ignore the constricted feeling that had fallen upon her.

Nightmares had haunted her sleep as a child and she'd never told anyone that before. This one was vivid and Lia knew that it was trying to tell her something.

 _Run._

She had been the hunted, just like the deer. Bleeding, broken, dying, she was the deer and it felt like fate. Just as fast as she'd witnessed what would become of her, she felt the need to dive right back into the trap.

Because even when the deer runs from the hunter, the crosshairs of the gun still follow them to their death. Once you're cornered with a target on you, there's no way out.

Lia wanted to fight, she really did and she believed she could. She had it in her to, but she couldn't help herself.

She could have anything in the world and she'd chosen love.

The regret she felt in making that decision lingered below the surface and she seemed to have acknowledged that, yet still couldn't make herself do anything about it.

It, they, she, had to mean something more.

She had to try again, because when things finally settled and they were happy they would be the family everyone envied. If she gave up now she would never forgive herself.

Lia got up then, and still shaking from her vivid dream, she paced the length of the room, wanting nothing more than to go back home.

 _Home._

Lia rummaged through the drawers for something warm to wear and eventually found a grey hoodie, and was starting to pull it on until she saw that 'NYPD' was printed on the front of it and with a grimace she threw it back down on the bed.

Eventually she settled on the pair of scrubs the nurse had given her at the hospital and after getting changed she sat back down and ran a hand through her hair.

What was she doing?

Pacing again, her thoughts resumed and it dawned on her that she should leave a note. She didn't want to wake her brother, not after last night so leaving a note would have to do.

Moving toward the door, she winced as it creaked upon opening and then hurried over to a drawer she hoped had some kind of paper in.

She pulled out a crumpled piece of lined paper and an old pen, and then she had no idea what to write.

Lia settled on something short. There was no point getting all messy over her feelings, she just needed to tell it as it was.

 _Sonny,_

 _I'm real sorry, but I just can't do it yet. I can't leave him and I know I got your hopes up but I'll be okay. Tell your detective friends thank you for the other night._

 _Lia._

She hated herself for leaving and she stood in the middle of the room for several minutes, doubting herself until something clicked and she hurried toward the front door, opening it and closing it softly behind her.

Home wasn't too far away from her Brother's and it was exactly that, it was home.

 **X**

Sonny woke early the next morning, with the thought of bringing Lia breakfast in bed. With a small smile on his face he left his room and immediately noticed that the door to Lia's room was ajar. Not wanting to intrude, he moved past it, trying not to think the worst. Until a piece of folded paper and an uncapped pen caught his attention.

Running a hand over his face he picked it up and unfolded it. He gave a sad sigh as he read it over, three times.

Lia had left.

He felt sick.

She had really gone back to him.

 **How angry are you at Lia right now? Told you I wanted this to be realistic though!**

 **Hope you enjoyed and I will try and get the next chapter up before Christmas for you all**

 **Please drop a review for me**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi all,**

 **Here is chapter 8 and this story is slowly making it's way toward the end.**

 **I hope you're all still enjoying this.**

 **Also hope you are having a good holiday season!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work**

 **Enjoy**

Chloe had debated whether or not to behind her friend's back for a week or so, and had eventually decided it was in her best interest to do so.

A quick google search had told her where to go and it was a snowy morning that she found herself running for cover in the precinct building that housed the Special Victims Unit.

She had no idea what to say, but she knew her friend needed help. The last she'd seen or heard from Lia had been three weeks ago. It hadn't been planned. Lia had been out running and Chloe was coming out of a coffee shop. It had been hard enough to get Lia to stop, let alone get her to talk to her.

It didn't take long for Chloe to figure out Dan had been beating her and the fact Lia seemed to think it was okay was beyond her. But she wasn't in her position so she wasn't prepared to judge. She just wanted to help, or rather get Lia the help she needed.

Glad for the warmth of the building, she removed her duffel coat before clipping on her visitors badge and after asking the security guard the floor number she needed, she was on her way to the seventh floor.

A desk sergeant took her request and after five minutes of waiting for someone to talk to, she was introduced to Detective Amaro. He was kind and smiled a lot.

He wrote down her name before asking what she needed to help with.

"This isn't really about me, but I need some help with a friend… I don't know how to help her and God she needs it."

"What's happening with your friend, or how old is she?"

"Ah she's 18, like me and I think… I know her partner's hitting her. I'm not sure if they have to be married, to class it as domestic violence…" Chloe shrugged and Amaro shook his head.

"Abuse is abuse." He said quietly and at her faint smile he continued, "I take it you've tried talking to her…"

"I saw her a few weeks ago. I think she's blocked my number now though. She doesn't see anything wrong in the way he treats her, but he's just taken over a big work position and I don't know, she's blinded by him."

Chloe didn't know how else to explain it and her attempts at that were cut off by Detective Carisi who at that moment entered the squad room and recognised the glasses wearing women from his sister's dorm room hallway.

"Chloe, right?" He asked, hurrying over and instantly thinking the worst.

"Lia's brother." She sighed as Amaro came to the realisation that they knew each other and that the 'friend', Chloe had been talking about was Lia.

"Did something happen, have you heard from her?" Carisi asked quickly and she gave a slow shake of her head.

"Not for a few weeks. She never contacted me about leaving college or anything. I thought she was dead." Chloe admitted only a little louder than a whisper.

"It's gotten worse, though?" He tried to forget what Chloe had said. He would never forgive himself if Lia died, if Dan killed her.

"Yeah I guess, I mean that's why I'm here. She might not want help from me, but she needs it from someone. The way she used to talk about you, I would have thought she'd have gone to you."

He looked at the floor. The last time he'd seen her he was convinced the same, that she wanted help and was willing to let him do that for her.

The way she'd fallen apart in his arms was a moment he couldn't shake and it was honestly one of the most raw moments of her life, where she'd let herself feel every damn emotion that was bubbling beneath the surface.

"I mean I can try and keep calling, emailing, messaging you know, but it just feels so…"

"Hopeless." He finished and she nodded and stood from her chair.

"Don't let him break her. Lia's worth so much more than him, I just wish she saw that."

"I know. I'll try my best Chloe."

Chloe gave a small smile before throwing her coat over her arm and following Amaro back over to the entrance, where she thanked him and left the precinct.

He watched from where he stood at Amaro's desk and when the other detective returned he sighed.

Lia didn't see it, she didn't know how bad it really was and the fact Sonny knew where it was going made him want to track down Dan and beat the living shit out of him.

Violence wasn't the answer, but maybe payback was.

 **X**

It was early the next week, when the detectives were overrun with cases. The holiday rush. They were all tired and overworked and Sonny had hardly a moment to dwell on Lia's situation.

"Just got a call from a responding officer…" Liv came out of her office, and they all stared at her for a moment, almost too exhausted to comprehend what she was saying.

"Nick, you come with me. Fin, hold down the fort here."

Amaro stood, pulling his overcoat from the back of his chair and grabbing his badge and gun from his desk drawer.

The two left, and began the slow drive to the address they'd been given.

Snow fell as they hurried to meet the officer waiting for them in the doorway to the brick apartment building and the three of them moved inside.

"Neighbours called it in a little over an hour ago. Told operators they heard yelling and the sound of something breaking."

Liv and Nick shared a look before they followed the officer up to the apartment door on the top floor.

"I told you, I'm fine!" They heard a familiar voice yell and Liv sighed as her detective's sister noticed the two of them.

"I don't need you." She muttered, as Liv made her way over to Lia after telling Nick to talk to Dan and get his side of the story.

"Why don't you sit down, Lia. We can just talk about what happened."

"There's nothing to talk about." She held her hands up in defeat.

"We can't just leave this alone, your neighbours called the police, they were concerned." Liv countered and after standing her ground eventually Lia made her way to sit on the couch.

Liv didn't miss the way she limped, or the way she had her hair positioned in a way that shielded her from everyone. She thought she noticed bruising on Lia's neck and before she followed the young woman she turned to face the female officer who'd been with her.

"Call a bus, she looks like she needs medical attention, even if she says she doesn't." Liv told her and the officer nodded before moving away to radio it in.

"So Lia, do you want to tell me what happened?" She asked as she sat down opposite her.

"No." Lia snapped shortly, before wincing and looking away, a wave of nausea coming over her. "We had a fight, okay. Nothing to get worked up over."

"Just walk me through what happened, yeah?" Liv spoke softly and after an eye roll Lia began talking.

"I got home and Dan was home early and… We slept together and he was angry…"

Lia was absolutely terrified. The police had been called to their house, by their neighbours. It made it all seem more real and the fact Dan was talking to a detective in the current moment made her angry. That surprised her, she'd never felt such anger toward him before.

She knew he'd be telling lies without a second thought. He was smooth like that. He could think on his feet and something like this would be swept away tidily without a fuss. This time he'd hurt her, her soul and her body

Unless she fought back and that made her feel sick with dread.

Nothing could take away what he did to her and nothing could make it better.

Lia went to stand, needing to pace, needing to gain control, needing everything to just, stop.

Everything did stop, as when she stood, a shooting stab of pain radiated through her body. She could remember every little thing that he'd done to her and the panic that raced through her mind at the horrific memory made her shake.

"Lia? Lia, honey are you okay?" She heard a voice say, but she couldn't see who it was coming from.

Why couldn't she see?

The voice was snuffed out by the growing shadows in her mind.

Why couldn't she see? Why couldn't she hear?

She just wanted it all to stop and it did.

Lia didn't flinch as arms reached forward to catch her. She just wanted to stop, she wanted people to stop expecting the world from her.

Everything stopped spinning and as she lay in silence with her mind, in a painless place she just stopped fighting.

 **It took me a long time to figure out where to end it, but I figured here was an okay spot - Otherwise this chapter was twice as long.**

 **Please, let me know your thoughts in a review.**

 **5 reviews for chapter 9.**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


	9. Chapter 9

**Happy new year!**

 **Here is chapter 9 as promised.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

 **Enjoy.**

Lia came to, with an oxygen mask on her face, machines beeping obnoxiously and no idea where she was.

Dan's loud voice told her that she was still at their apartment and someone seemed to notice her stir.

"Lia, can you hear me?" Someone asked to her right and she shut her eyes even tighter.

"Can you squeeze my hand?" One asked from the left.

"I'm calling my lawyer." Dan's voice shot through the rest and knowing she was done, she refused to humour any of them and kept her eyes tightly shut.

"Her pressure's stable, we're ready to take her now Sergeant." The person on her right spoke.

Nothing hurt more than Lia's thoughts, and she felt herself flinch as the stretcher she was on began to move.

"I'll ride with her. You take him back to the precinct. Call Barba when you get there." Liv told Nick as she moved after the paramedics with Lia. It dawned on her then that she needed to call Carisi, right then.

She pulled out her phone as they rode the elevator down to the ground floor and he picked up after several rings, clearly hoping she wasn't about to tell her where to go and what he needed to do.

"I'm with your sister right now. She's okay but we're going to the hospital, just to make sure. Nick's bringing in Dan for questioning."

"What hospital? I'm there, I'm coming…" He got out and she told him the hospital before he hung up abruptly. Pocketing her phone, she followed the medics toward the ambulance, that one of them hurried forward to open, not wanting to stop in the below freezing temperature.

They were crawling through the city traffic when Lia mumbled something under her breath and wriggled her fingers slightly.

"Lia, your brother's meeting us at the hospital." Liv told her and there was an immediate reaction of,

"Fuck you." That Lia slurred under her breath, yet she still refused to open her eyes. She was stubborn that was for sure.

"You're not angry at me or your brother, Lia." She said gently, glad when the traffic finally picked up its pace.

She thought she noticed a tear escape from beneath her closed eyes, and leant forward on the bench to take a hold of Lia's hand and gave a small smile when she didn't fight it.

"I don't want any of this." She muttered, and finally opened her eyes, wincing when she did.

"Why did this happen to me? I thought he was going to kill me. I couldn't breathe." Her words startled Liv and the paramedic who was writing down notes on a new file looked up.

Lia pulled her hand away. "I can't… Breathe…" She spoke so softly that neither of them heard her until she tried sitting up, moving her hand to push the oxygen mask away from where it was sitting.

"I don't want any of this." She repeated, "Just let me go, please. I'm okay, I just can't breathe. I want to go home."

The paramedic who'd introduced himself as Mark moved forward, "Lia, I need you to focus on your breathing for me, okay?" When she didn't reply, he reached over to move the oxygen mask back into place, and she flinched, tears falling freely.

"He hit me. He tried to kill me. He said he loved me, but…"

"Lia." His voice cut through her rambling and she shut her eyes tightly.

"I just want it to be over." She muttered, trying to rolling over, away from them and crying out in pain when she did.

The heart monitor beeped loudly, more quickly and that made Lia even more panicked. Something was wrong. She could feel her heartbeat pounding in her chest and her lungs were screaming for air. She couldn't breathe and she couldn't think and it wouldn't stop.

"Breathe, Lia, breathe." Liv murmured, watching as Mark got out a syringe and filled it from a small bottle.

"I'm going to give you something to help you calm down okay, Lia?" He told her and as Lia's cries loudened he injected the clear liquid.

Liv ran a hand through her hair glad when Mark nodded as Lia settled back down into a numb state of mind and he then moved back to his sitting position next to her on the bench.

"You know her, sergeant?" He asked and she gave a nod before turning to look at him with a sad smile.

"She's one of my detectives' sisters."

"I'm sorry." He said earnestly and with that they fell back into silence until they pulled up at the ER.

The paramedic who'd been driving the bus came through to help Mark get her out, and after casting another look over Lia, Liv ran inside before them hoping to catch Carisi before he caught sight of his sister.

"Is she okay?" His voice immediately called and she noticed him rushing forward from where he'd been waiting.

"They sedated her on the way here…"

"Oh god. I don't know what to do, what to say to her." He muttered, looking over his boss' shoulder as he noticed the stretcher move through the double doors.

"Hey, she's scared. What she needs right now his her big brother."

He nodded, "Thanks Sarge." Then he hurried over to where they were wheeling Lia into an examination room.

"Lia." He called as he neared them and one of the paramedics looked up, "I'm her brother." He mentioned quickly and when Mark nodded, he moved forward to stand near her head where he was slightly more out of there way.

He could tell she'd been crying and that was what told him how bad it was. Maybe this time she hadn't tried to keep such a strong front up.

"Sonny." She murmured and raised a hand to catch a hold of his and grip it tightly. He stayed with her whilst the doctors and nurses fussed over her and finally they all filed out of the room, leaving brother and sister alone in the room together.

"Don't be mad." Were her first words and he moved to sit next to her on the bed as he tried to figure out what to say to her.

"I'm not angry at you Lia." He said softly and she looked down at her hands.

"I shouldn't have gone back to him. I'm so stupid." She lent against his shoulder and let out a sigh.

They sat in silence for a while before Lia asked a question that was bugging her, "When can we go? I need to explain to Dan, about all of this. I'm fine."

"They didn't say anything to me, but I can go find out? You're coming home with me though." He told her as he stood and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"Deal." She spoke softly and with that he left the room. He quickly ran into Liv, who was waiting outside in the hallway and she gave a small smile as she noticed him.

"She okay?" She asked and he gave a shrug.

"I mean she says she is, but I don't know. I'm going to find her doctor."

Liv gave a nod before stepping forward. "I'll go have a chat with her."

He made to move past her and paused. "Do you think she'll go back to him, again?" He asked and a sad look came over Liv's face.

"I hope not." Was all she said before she went over and let herself into the exam room Lia was in.

Lia looked up from where she was staring at a bruise on her arm as the sergeant entered her room. "You're gonna ask me what happened again aren't you?" She guessed and Liv gave a light laugh before sitting down when Lia gestured to the chair next to her bed.

"We can talk about it if you want. I'm just here to listen." She offered and Lia looked away. For a while Liv thought she was simply going to ignore her until she started speaking and as she did, she refused to look at the brunette but watching her, Liv noticed the honesty and pain in her eyes and knew what she was saying was real.

"He treated me like a princess. He really did and when we hit a rocky patch I thought moving in together was in our best interest. I still love him, I do. But things changed. He started working more hours and coming home later and later. When he did come home though, he was angry and I thought I could control it, or avoid it you know? I figured out how he liked to channel that pretty quickly. He used to talk about marriage and children and then two weeks later he made me go on the pill. He got rough and then his anger followed us everywhere and not even sex could stop it. I didn't want it and that made him worse so sometimes it was easier to just go with it. Tonight was bad though and he's never done anything like it before, believe me."

"What did he do Lia?" She asked quietly and that was the moment that the girl looked her in the eye, tears brimming.

"He tried to smother me with a pillow, and then his hands were around my neck. We were in bed and suddenly he changed and he was yelling at me. I couldn't breathe and I was so scared because it was my fault for going back to him."

"Oh Lia I'm sorry. It wasn't your fault though honey."

Lia went silent and it was then Liv came to a realisation.

"Maybe we should talk abut a rape kit. If you said no, or didn't want it then having evidence that backs it up will help in charging Dan."

"What? No he didn't rape me, Sergeant Benson. I know what rape is and he didn't, he didn't rape me."

Lia would never admit to something like that. He'd tried to kill her but he didn't break her, not in that way.

"Lia I know it can be difficult to comprehend and it may seem scary, but it's over now and this may help you."

"None of this helps me!" She yelled, throwing her hands up and Liv gave a sigh, just as Carisi made his way through the door to the exam room they were in.

"She's trying to say Dan raped me." Lia instantly cried and Carisi faltered.

"Lia…" He started before she cut him off.

"Stop 'Lia – ing' me." The sound of desperation was evident in her voice.

"Sorry." He said slowly and it was then that Lia noticed the clipboard he was holding.

"Do I need to sign those? I want to go." She asked aggressively and he nodded.

"Yeah, but maybe that's not for the best right now. You need to take it easy, think all this through."

"I'm not doing the stupid rape kit. I wasn't raped." Pushing back the hospital blanket that was covering her, she moved into a sitting position and swung her legs over the side of the bed, facing away from the two of them.

"He didn't rape me, he loves me." She then yelled as she stood and noticed one of them about to talk.

"Just take me to see Dan. I need to see him." Lia spoke in a quiet tone then and at Liv's next words she was unable to look at either of them.

"So he can tell you what you need to say? You need to think about yourself Lia, and not him."

"Okay. Fine, do the stupid rape kit." Was all she muttered before falling into a world of her own.

Lia allowed the nurse to tend to her wounds, and finally the doctor to procede with the rape kit where both Liv and Carisi stayed at her side, after her silent request. She didn't speak and she didn't mention Dan. She was just numb, her mind thoughtless and nothing anyone tried to say pulled her out of it.

It was a few hours later that Lia was able to leave, after the same nurse came back to hand her a pamphlet on domestic abuse and explain how she needed to take care of herself.

That didn't help any of them.

This time however, Lia didn't have to leave in a set of scrubs, as Liv had ducked back to Dan's apartment to grab a few pairs of clothing for her. In her return, she saw Lia smile for the first time.

After getting changed, Lia refused the wheelchair she was offered and once in Liv's car she fell into a light sleep, until she was woken by the sound of a siren as they neared the precinct building.

"I won't be able to speak to him, will I?" She spoke softly, startling the other two and her hopeful expression dissapeared quickly when her question was answered.

It was then that Lia realised that maybe she didn't want to see Dan right then and there. His lawyer would be there and so would his father. That almost scared Lia more than Dan himself. She was a disgrace to the family and perhaps they were at the point where they were okay with throwing her under the bus.

Maybe love wouldn't get them out of this one. Dan would be okay with moving on and leave without a fuss. It would be tidy, with no fights and she would have to settle. They were bigger than her. She could fight herself, but not them; not someone who'd fallen out of love and an angry family and a team of lawyers.

She was _just Lia._

She'd always been small for her age, and never tall enough for the rides at the carnival. She was small and had absolutely nothing against their army.

Lia followed Liv and Carisi out of the elevator and toward the squad room at a distance, feeling sick to her stomach.

The first person she noticed was Dan's father, who was standing in front of the window looking into the interrogation room, where Dan himself was.

She pushed past the two and hurried forward, despite the cold look Mr. Houghton gave her.

All she needed to know was if he loved her, if what they had was real.

Ignoring the older man, she turned to look through the window and try and listen to what they were saying. Dan had a smug look on his face, and she zoned in on the lawyer who was talking.

Clearly she was just on time.

"My client had a rough day at work and upon arriving home, Lia suggested they go into the bedroom. Lia then proceded to get more and more aggressive and my client may have held Lia down in attempts to subdue her." The lawyer spoke Lia's name with distain and a frown, and it then, watching Dan with the man that she felt sick. He was nodding along in agreement at the man's cold words.

He was blaming her.

Maybe she deserved it.

Or maybe this was meant to be the moment that she proved her love and fixed her mistakes. But she couldn't do it.

Because she was only Lia and she just didn't have that amount of fight in her.

"I didn't… I don't…" She stammered. She had no idea what she wanted.

That was decided for her as the lawyer with Dan spoke again.

"We don't want to press charges against Miss Lia, but we'll be cutting all ties with her and hoping she gets the help she needs."

Her world was falling apart in front of her and every feeling she hadn't let herself feel hit her, right there in the middle of the precinct. With Mr. Houghton telling her to keep away from his son, and Liv saying they were the ones pressing charges, and her brother at her side.

They were finished, Lia was done and it was all just a bit too much.

 **This chapter was a bit longer, so I hope you enjoyed it!**

 **Let me know your thoughts / what you would like to see in a review!**

 **5+ reviews for chapter 10!**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


	10. Chapter 10

**Apologies for the delay,**

 **Here's chapter 10!**

 **Only two more to go at this stage.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters, nor am I making a profit from this work**

 **Enjoy x**

Lia didn't care about any of it anymore because suddenly none of it seemed to matter. All of it had been for nothing and she'd never felt so stupid in her entire life.

As soon as her tears had slowed enough that she could see straight, she wanted to leave. Really, she wanted to forget it all and bury the pain and sheer embarrassment that she felt.

For a moment, where she was sat in the break room, rocking herself back and forth she thought that maybe she should return to live with her parents, where she could lock herself in her old room and cry herself to sleep, over and over and over.

Perhaps the white wash walls and old posters would serve as some sort of comfort.

Lia wasn't the sort of person to break down and cry. When things got tough, she would work to the point where she was black and blue but things were okay.

Lia worked hard, she didn't cry.

Now, she had never cried so much. She cried on the floor and in the break room. She sniffled into her sleeve in the car, and tears continued to streak down her cheeks as she curled up on the couch she made it to.

Dan never loved her and the fact she believed he ever had, killed her. It absolutely broke her in two because she never saw it.

The anger he'd shown had never equated to a lack of love in Lia's eyes as it was always cancelled out by the unconditional amount _she_ showed Dan.

In summary, it absolutely sucked.

"I'm so stupid." Lia repeated again with a sigh later that evening and nothing her brother would try and say each time would change her mind.

"Dan's the stupid one." At his words, she gave a small smile this time, before moving a hand up to bite at her nails. After a moment she spoke again.

"Are you guys… Going to charge him…? How does that work? What if I don't want it?"

"We want to. Ultimately it comes down to the DA, who I told you about earlier." He explained lightly, although too exhausted to go into too much detail. Lia didn't need to know any of that, at that point anyhow.

She didn't seem too worried at his lack of words as she gave a small nod, "Right. Anyway I'm really tired so I'm going to go to bed now if that's alright."

Without waiting for his response, she staggered to her feet and made a beeline to the room she'd stayed in the previous time and it was in mere minutes that she was in bed, hidden under the covers.

Finding sleep difficult to come by she was surprised as her mind drifted to a soothing memory, one that she thought she'd have forgotten.

Lia had always been the youngest child and that had often been lonely. As she grew up, each of her sibling's did it faster and left home for bigger and better things. Their home had a small backyard with a large tree at the fence that never held a treehouse. Being a child however, Lia had made it her home anyway. There were branches to sit on and leaves to peek through and that had been good enough for her.

Nothing could hurt her there.

Until the day she was 13 and suddenly the bendy branch she used to climb couldn't hold her anymore and she broke her wrist.

That was the end of Lia's life of adventure and she began to find it in books instead. Tales of pioneers and those who only stopped at death.

She sat up in bed then and in the dark she came to a realisation. The branch that led the way to her and Dan's home had cracked and splintered and dropped her to the ground. Maybe it wasn't even the broken branch, maybe the tree had never been home and Dan had simply pushed her, down, down, down.

 **X**

Lia woke in the early hours of the morning and found herself sitting under a blanket on the living room couch watching reruns of 'Friends'.

It was nearing six thirty and the wedding of Monica and Chandler that she noticed the light flick on in her brother's room.

Realising the cup of tea she'd made had gone cold, she pulled herself off the couch and toward the kitchen, mug in hand to brew some fresh coffee for the both of them.

"Are you up Lia?" She heard her brother call, and even as she'd readied herself for something so, it startled her and she flinched, dropping the now empty cup that she held.

She leapt backward as she heard it shatter and crack against the tile floor, and thought her heart was going to beat right out of her chest when she felt an arm touch her shoulder.

"Oh gosh, I'm sorry." She mumbled before hurrying to try and pick up the remnants of the cup.

"Lia, stop. It's okay." He whispered before moving over to a cupboard and coming back with a dustpan.

She refused to look at him as she swept it up, her face red in embarrassment.

"It's just a cup." He tried and she shrugged before moving to the trash can and then handing back the dustpan.

"Look at me."

Lia folded her arms over her chest, but her eyes flickered up to meet his for a brief moment.

"It'll all be okay."

She moved forward into a hug at his reassurance and for the first time in a while she felt like she could breathe.

 **X**

Carisi was late to work that morning, due to not wanting to leave Lia alone but eventually she'd persuaded him to go and so he had. But he couldn't concentrate and it was frustrating being on the edge of investigation into Dan.

"Does Lia know what she wants to do yet?" Amanda asked when Nick turned away to answer a phone call.

"She asked about it, but I think she's still trying to process the whole thing."

The blonde detective nodded before taking a swig from her coffee and mulling over what he'd said.

"We can press charges without her 'consent' anyway, can't we?" Carisi wondered and just as Amanda was about to respond, Liv turned up having just had a conversation with Barba.

"We can, and we will. Barba looked over the case and said he could do something with it. Even with them having a big family reputation."

"Lia would have to testify. There were no witnesses, no footage." Carisi thought aloud and his words were taken a little too seriously.

"Are you saying we shouldn't press charges?" Liv asked with raised eyebrows.

"I'm saying I want what's best for my sister." He spoke defensively and then Amanda held her hands up in her own kind of defence. Really, they all wanted what was best for Lia. They just saw it in different ways.

"She's scared and what she needs right now is her big brother, to help her through this. It's our job. He beat her and it's our job to put him away for that. Hold her hand, be there for her but don't convince her this is a mistake because a few years later when she's still stuck in the thoughts of that relationship, she'll wish she had." Amanda spoke carefully, trying to get her point across.

"You're right." He agreed shortly, looking down at his desk.

Amanda gave a casual shrug. "I know." She murmured, and he gave a light laugh.

His job was to protect his sister and that was exactly what he would do.

 **X**

Lia was a sensible person. When she came to a problem she used logic to get herself out of it.

So it was mid afternoon that she found herself google searching the most absurd things, mainly being:

 _How to get over a break up._

The answers were dismal and none really seemed serious. Besides the fact there were no romantic films to be found in her brother's apartment, the only thing she saw to be helpful was talking.

She couldn't talk to Sonny about him, about the names he called her and the way he used her in bed. Not yet. However, she didn't want to shut it out and that was when she searched for a counsellor or therapist in the area.

It was something she didn't want to admit to doing, but she wanted to talk and talk and talk. That seemed like a healthy place to do it.

There was one counsellor she found at an advocacy centre nearby and after letting her finger hover above the call button, she pressed it and stood up to pace.

It rang for a moment before being picked up by a young man on the front desk.

"… Can I help you?" She caught the ending of his question and clearing her throat before speaking.

"Hi, yeah I was calling to ask about an appointment with your counsellor, Rachel Conrad?"

There was a moment of silence where she could faintly hear the tapping of fingers on a keyboard. After a minute or so he came back to her.

"There's a space free at 11.30 tomorrow morning if that suits?" He checked and thankful it was so soon and she didn't have a whole lot of time to worry endlessly about it she confirmed the time and the two hung up.

With her mind slightly more at ease she sat back down and placed her phone on the table in front of her before returning her focus to the last few episodes of 'Friends' that had started again.

 **X**

Lia hardly slept that night and woke early the next morning, although her brother had already left for work.

She almost wished he was still there to find out where she was going that morning.

Nearly too nervous to eat, she made herself some toast and washed it down with a cup of coffee before going to get changed.

It was 10.30 when she finally pulled on her boots and jacket before heading to the door. This was it

There were a few other women waiting around in the building. Two were talking to each other and the third was scrolling through her phone, seemingly ignoring the way her hand was shaking.

The person she'd spoken to on the phone looked up from the book they were reading and he gave warm smile and stood.

His name tag said 'Peter' and Lia returned the smile, albeit smaller on her part.

"I have an appointment at 11.30 with Rachel." She said and he gave another smile before gesturing toward what looked to be the waiting room.

"Take a seat, Rachel will come and get you when she's ready. Can I get you anything?"

Lia shook her head softly before turning in the direction he'd pointed and sat herself down on a light blue couch that had stuffing bursting out of it in some parts.

It wasn't long before she heard a door open and a middle aged women led an older women out, and spotting Lia she bid goodbye to her previous 'patient' and made her way over to Lia who swallowed nervously.

She wore a smile as she held a hand out to shake and Lia accepted it, before standing and following her over to the office.

Rachel shut the door behind them and gestured toward a small couch.

"Please, take a seat." Another smile and Lia nodded, settling down with one leg crossed over the other.

"So, Lia isn't it?" Rachel checked.

"Yeah, yeah." Lia muttered and looked at her knees.

They sat in silence for a moment until Lia realised that she was waiting for her to say something. She had to be prepared to take the first step. She needed to talk about why she was here and what she was feeling.

That was the point.

"Uh…." Lia began, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable. "I just don't know I guess. Where to start, what I'm feeling…"

"What made you make the appointment?" Rachel asked and Lia shrugged.

"I think I just wanted to talk to someone with a different perspective."

"I see." Rachel mused and when Lia fell back into silence she spoke again, "I need you to tell me a little background. Are you still together with your partner?"

"Not anymore." Lia started softly. "He tried to kill me… I don't think he meant to you know, but it still happened."

"That's not okay."

"No," Lia said softly, "It's not."

"Where are you staying now. With friends, family?"

"With my brother for the moment." Lia then came across the thought that she couldn't stay there forever. It may not happen tomorrow, but there would come a day where she would out do her stay and need to leave. Where was she meant to go then? Back to college? Her parents?

"Ah, you're close with him?" She guessed and smiled at Lia's nod.

"More so then with my sisters. I'm the youngest."

"That's good you have someone there for you that you can trust." Rachel started and Lia gave a half smile

"That's also a problem I think. He cares too much." Lia laughed lightly.

"What's on your mind?" Rachel questioned after a moments silence.

"Well when I was with Dan, when we moved in together he made me go on the pill. He used to say how much he wanted children and so I thought that maybe if I were to get pregnant things would start to get better. So every morning when I was meant to be taking that little pill, I would flush it."

Lia paused, sighed.

"I'm late. I really think I'm pregnant and I don't know what to do." 

**A mini cliffhanger for you!**

 **Let me know your thoughts in a review.**

 **I am still in the writing process for the last two chapters although I have a vague idea on what I want to do, if you would like to see something in particular, drop it in a review and I'll try fit it in!**

 **Another scene with Lia and the team? Maybe meeting Barba? Family reunion with Lia and her parents?  
** **  
You tell me!** **  
**

 **I'd like to try for 5+ reviews again, but we'll see huh?**

 **Keep showing the love and you'll see chapter 11 a lot quicker!**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey guys, here's chapter 11 and we only have one more chapter to go!**

 **Also thank you for your reviews and little suggestions, they really help out!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or its characters nor am I making a profit from this work**

 **Enjoy x**

She had never felt so sick in her entire life. Rachel had suggested she do a pregnancy test with one of the nurses before she left and she'd shakily agreed.

The nurse, Jenna had left several minutes ago and was about due to come back and deliver the news. Quietly, Lia hoped she weren't pregnant. She didn't think she would be able to handle that, no matter how much support she had because it would always be his baby.

Jenna returned a few moments later with the ultimate poker face, and she sat down in the chair next to hers to tell her the worst, that she was in fact pregnant. With Dan's child.

Growing up Lia had never particularly wanted children, but after meeting Dan all that seemed to change. Maybe it was just a fairytale thought of the future that distracted her from the true nature of their relationship. That Dan was no prince, nor was she some damsel in distress needing to be saved. However, in playing into his cruel games she'd made herself exactly that.

Lia spent the rest of the walk back to the apartment with a lump in her throat, reality having sucker punched her straight in the gut.

The thing that made her feel a little nervous was the fact she couldn't hide it from her brother. She was mostly scared of his reaction. Thinking it would be more along the lines of disappointment then joy. And of course, he would smile and tell her that it was a good thing, but he would be sickened, filled nothing more than anger. That she let this happen.

 _How could she let this happen?_

 **X**

It was mid afternoon when her brother arrived home with the news that their parents had rung, and were wanting to see her.

She shrugged and looked at the ground. To be honest, she'd expected that call sooner. She loved her parents dearly but didn't think she had it in her to sit in the same room as them and explain how she had ended up in such a situation. How she had become like the women in the movies, who were broken beyond repair. How their lives were a never ending disaster that just never seemed to give them a break.

The point in her situation, was that she hadn't helped it. She never tried to better it for herself. Instead, the hole she was in had sunk deeper and deeper without her even noticing.

Now she wasn't just 12 foot down, she'd had the walls cave in on her. Trapping her in a lifetime of consequence. Something she would have to live with for the rest of her life.

Maybe not, but she hadn't let herself think about that yet. She didn't feel she deserved to. What Dan had done to her was wrong, and she hadn't deserved any of his beatings or angry words.

But she never tried to get away, never truly fought back and she had to live with that.

Now she was carrying his baby, and nothing could make her sicker.

People would ask, where the father of the child was and how she'd ended up as a single mother. They would pity her and look on with prying eyes. Lia would be known as the beaten woman who'd broken her entire life for the sake of a man who never really loved her.

It killed her.

"I don't think I can see them yet. Maybe in a couple of weeks." Was her response and after that she fell into silence, unable to even fathom her feelings, her feelings that crushed the air out of her lungs and twisted her mind inside out.

With a sigh, her brother had nodded and he understood to a certain degree and the pain his sister was in was overly evident.

"Some of the team were going to come by later, they want to get some more information about you and… him." He finished shortly, almost lamely. He couldn't even say the man's name. Even the single thought of him made him angry, and oh the things he would do if the law didn't exist. But of course, it did.

"Ah okay I guess." That worried Lia, but talking about the times Dan had called her names seemed the least of her problems.

The faint heartbeat she thought she could feel in her stomach pounded through her head and she swayed on the spot.

"Lia, are you feeling okay? You look pale."

She waved a hand dismissively, but leant against the couch behind her before speaking. "I'm fine. Just stressed I guess, about all of this."

He nodded, and took her word. "It'll all be over soon Lia."

She nodded. _No it won't_. She thought. _It won't ever be over_.

 **X**

Olivia and Amanda turned up, along with Barba an hour or so later and Lia was strictly professional as she'd told herself over and over again that this was like a job. She had to recite the facts and not think about it too much.

She sat at the head of the dining table, with the other four on either side of it, and all of them were watching her and she focused her gaze on the bottle of water in front of her.

"What do you need to know?" She was the first to speak out in the silence, and her voice was cool, unemotional and that was sad. She'd almost been destroyed past the point of feelings, but to Lia, this was a good thing, something to be used to her advantage.

"Any little details about the incidents you remember help. Days and times will help us form a timeline."

"I don't remember exact dates." Her expression flashed panic for a second, and sitting closest to her, both Amanda and Olivia caught that.

"That's okay. Just try your best." Olivia spoke up, soothingly so and was surprised to hear Lia scoff.

Lia wasn't used to being told that. She expected herself to be the best of everything without excuse. Being told to try her best seemed pathetic and that was how she felt. Pathetic and numb.

And with the dull throbbing in her head, of Dan's voice calling out over and over again, she told the tale of their relationship.

How they were a beautiful rose garden that turned to nothing more than dead roses, and prickly thorns.

 **X**

It wasn't long after Lia had finished speaking that she'd moved away, and without so much of an explaination, had locked herself in the guest bedroom.

Sitting with her back against the door, she could catch bits and pieces of their conversation she found herself a little distraught.

Dan had done terrible, terrible things to her and there was no denying that. But she was carrying his baby. And for some reason Lia felt the need for Dan to know.

The voices in her head bickered back and forth. Dan had hit her and what was to say he wouldn't hit their child? But then again, he had talked about the family he wanted them to have with the biggest smile. One that took Lia to a place of childhood. Growing up with two loving parents, and her siblings.

The perfect family. One she thought she wanted.

Lia was startled by a knock at the door then and quickly scrambled into a standing position. The voice on the other side let her know that it was Amanda, the blonde detective and after much consideration, Lia flicked the lock and allowed her in.

"You okay?" The southern detective asked and Lia shrugged.

"Wish everyone would stop asking me that." Amanda laughed and Lia turned and walked toward the small window that looked out onto the building next door.

Something about the idea that New York was beautiful made her chuckle then, and she sat down on the bed instead.

"Are the others listening at the door?" Lia then questioned harshly, still facing away from her.

"Nah, they're in the kitchen."

"Ah." Lia said shortly. "Can I ask something?" She then went on to say, and Amanda moved over to sit next to her on the bed.

"Sure, Lia."

Lia gave a faint smile. "I know this sound idiotic. But I recently got this news that I want to tell Dan."

Amanda didn't click straight away. "No Lia you can't. You need to put Dan behind you. Your future doesn't have to include him."

The encouraging words didn't make it very far.

"I'm afraid he will be part of my future." She paused, noting Amanda's confused expression. "Considering I'm pregnant with his child, and just don't tell anyone." She finished in a mumble.

Amanda was slightly gobsmacked, and simply placed a hand over Lia's until she came up with something to say.

"That doesn't have to change any of this." She settled on and Lia gave a nod despite the fact that carrying his baby changed absolutely _everything_.

 **X**

The team said goodbye not long after Amanda left Lia in peace, and it was only when she noticed her brother standing in the doorway that she realised they had gone.

"Don't ask if I'm okay." She warned with a small smile.

"Well I know this may not be what you wanted."

"You're right." Lia sighed. "I didn't really expect any of this to happen. And I mean all of it. Why would Dan even like a girl like me? What did he see in me, that no other boy ever has?"

"I guess he was looking for easy prey." Carisi spoke truthfully and Lia raised her eyebrows at him.

"Wow. Low blow for you man."

He laughed, "Let me make it up for you. Pizza for dinner?" He asked, and at her grin, and nod he left the room to order it.

It was then that Lia realised that her future was completely up to her. She was no longer under Dan's control, and she had the ability to choose what she wanted to do with what had become of her life.

She _did not_ have to raise this baby. She _did not_ have to keep this baby, and above all, she _did not_ have to tell Dan about it.

The two talked about general stuff over dinner, and Lia toyed with the idea of bringing up her situation, but each time she felt she was about to say something she couldn't.

"I know you're unsure about this whole trial thing, but it'll come up sooner rather than later and both Liv and Barba agreed that they want you to practice what you'll say during your testimony at the trial."

"Oh?" Lia mumbled and picked up another slice of pizza.

"They were trying to find an empty courtroom for tomorrow afternoon, to practice."

She didn't get to reply then, as the phone rang and she watched as her brother answered it. The conversation was short, and Lia quickly figured out that it was about what they were talking about just then.

"Tomorrow at 3pm." He confirmed and she felt a sick sense of dread cross her, but she met his gaze with a smile anyway because she was anything but weak.

 **X**

Lia was left in the morning, with money for a taxi and the instruction that she was being met outside the court house by Olivia at five minutes to three.

Upon her brother walking out of the apartment for work, Lia had begun pacing, back and forth until she was light headed and nearly out of breath.

If anything, she suddenly wished she hadn't told Amanda she was pregnant. That made everything a little more difficult, and she realised this when she briefly scrolled through a list women's clinics that performed abortions in New York.

She made herself feel sick and had quickly exited out of the browser and deleted her history.

Everything told her that she didn't want this, but there was still a little something lingering below the surface telling her that a family was what she wanted. And it had been a concept that Dan had made sound so perfect.

Lia had absolutely no idea of what she wanted, and that fact brought her to tears, and she eventually found herself huddled in the corner of the living room.

Too often she had found herself cowering in the exact same position when Dan had downed one too many beers, but all of that seemed a blur then.

Without thinking, she pulled her phone back out and scrolled through to find Dan's contact.

She sat there for minutes, in a silent debate about what to do and in the end one side came out on top. _What was one more call?_

It rang several times before she even heard someone pick up and her breath hitched in her throat at the sound of the man who she once thought she loved.

"What the hell are you doing? I don't want to speak to you." The words cut through her like ice and as soon as she'd blurted the words out, she regretted it.

"I know. But, uh I'm pregnant."

She was cut off then, and as it dawned on her that she had quite possibly ruined everything she began to cry some more and suddenly the idea of playing the victim that afternoon felt like a terrible idea.

She was no victim. All of this she'd brought on herself. She wasn't worthy of having Dan charged, because in the end who could blame him?

She was never the one who left. All of those times she could have run to safety. Could have told someone, and she didn't. She toughed it out and never made it home to the finish line.

 **X**

It was ten past three when Carisi, who was already deep in thought about his sister noticed his cell ringing.

The caller ID told him it was Olivia and confused, he picked up the call.

"Hey, are you guys finished already?" He asked lightly and heard Olivia sigh on the other side.

"Lia didn't show up Carisi." The words hit him hard, and instantly he knew something was wrong, moreso when he dialled Lia's number after hanging up with Olivia.

It went straight to voice mail.

 _"Lia's not available right now, please leave a message after the beep."_

Lia didn't even make it out of the apartment.

 **Cliffhanger?**

 **I'm already writing the last chapter and it is ACTION PACKED.**

 **I don't really need any suggestions as I have it planned out how I like it, but please feel free to give me anything you want to see before it ends. It may not fit in, but I can try!**

 **5+ reviews again?**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


	12. Chapter 12 (Final)

**Here is chapter 12, the final chapter of 'Bring You Home'!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own SVU, nor am I making a profit from this work.**

 **Please read and review, one last time!**

 **Enjoy!**

At the scene unfolding in front of him, he instantly drew his weapon and fired. Twice. That was all it took and in that exact moment, he understood what Amanda had felt like. The weight that lifted from his shoulder's hit back down even harder as he hurried across the room to his sister.

Her tiny frame was covered in blood and he knew it was bad and for a moment he could hardly tell where it was coming from. When he figured it out, he pulled off his jacket and pressed it to the wound harshly, trying to slow the bleeding. With his other hand he fumbled with his radio before calling for a bus.

It was confirmed to be on route almost instantly, and he felt Lia's blood soaking through his jacket and onto his hands and its warmth made him feel sick. The pool of blood he was kneeling in made him even more so.

The time it took for the paramedics to arrive seemed incomprehensible, and in that time, Lia's eyelids had only fluttered open and shut a couple of times.

He was shoved out of the way with little sympathy by the paramedics, and he was shaky on his feet as he glanced at the dead cold body of Dan's that lay far too close to Lia's.

"Call in and tell them to have blood ready for a transfusion. We'll need a lot. It's going to be touch and go." He heard one of them say as they placed Lia on a stretcher and prepared her to move.

It was several rings after the call came through on his cell that he realised it was his ringing, that he picked up and unable to speak heard Liv on the other side.

"Lia. They're taking her to Mercy hospital." Was all he managed, before hanging up and hurrying after the paramedics.

Someone else in the building had obviously called 911 themselves, as there were several officers that were just arriving as they were leaving.

Carisi paused momentarily and pulled out his weapon.

"There's a body upstairs. Apartment 23 I fired my weapon twice, here." He almost threw it at the closest uniform, and missed most of what they said in response.

He was already at the bus when the officer came up behind him, asking who exactly he was.

"Detective Carisi, with SVU. It's my sister, if you don't mind." He gestured toward the person in the ambulance and after seeing a nod from the other young man he climbed inside and sat across from his little sister.

He hardly took his eyes off Lia the entire ride to the hospital, and the hushed and hurried voices of the paramedics in front of him drifted in and out.

With sirens blearing, they arrived rather quickly and as soon as the double doors opened, there was a team of doctors surrounding her and Carisi was left behind.

She was taken into an examination room and after a minute or two, a nurse came out to talk to him. In those few minutes, Olivia arrived with Nick following close behind.

The nurse's voice was calm given the situation, as she told him that Lia had suffered a tremendous amount of blood loss, and that there was internal damage. She finished by telling him that she was being taken up to an OR room and that she would come find him to update him on his sister during surgery.

"Thank you." He managed and with a small smile and nod, she left to rejoin the group as they moved toward the elevator, Lia still unmoving.

He hoped she didn't remember. For Lia's sake, he hoped she would never remember.

The sight of her lying on his kitchen floor was one that would haunt him for the rest of his life.

 **X**

As soon as Lia heard knocking at the door her heart was in her throat and for a moment she considered ignoring the other person and resorted to hiding in the kitchen.

The knocking however intensified, and something she didn't quite understand made her go ahead and open it.

He was standing outside, his hand still raised from knocking and seeing her, he gave a smirk, eyes bright.

Lia didn't want to invite him in, but he pushed past her and strode inside, an air of confidence about him, and that was what scared her.

She should have run, straight out the door but instead she followed him hoping she was able to calm the storm.

Dan yelled, and he hit and he shoved.

The tiles of the kitchen floor connected with the back of her head then as he threw her down.

For once she put up a fight, and she scratched and she screamed.

That made him angry, and with every blow to her tiny body she became more and more numb.

Tears welled in her eyes and clouded her vision. All she could see was Dan on top of her.

The knife came out of no where and as it came in contact with her skin Lia truly believed she was going to die.

It was nothing like Hollywood however, and Lia hardly felt each stab. Growing more light headed with each one, it seemed like hours later when a gunshot rang out and Dan's body dropped dead next to hers.

That was when the pain seared through her body. When her brother applied pressure to the wounds on her abdomen. She couldn't scream and the pain she felt was unconscious, her not being able to get away from it.

The one vivid thought that replayed over and over in her head was that she was pregnant. Dan had been angry at her and the fact she had called him made her weak. That thought put her out of misery, and the pain dulled into a mild buzz she was no longer aware of.

Pain was the thing that awoke her again and with a team of doctors swarmed around her poking and prodding at her.

Her hand swatted at one of them and their voices washed over her in a chorus.

"Lia we're going to put you under now." Was one of the phrases she caught on to and that panicked her.

"Baby." She managed to stutter out, her throat dry and scratchy.

A surgeon with a scrub cap and mask on raised his eyebrows at the others.

"You fight for us Lia." A female voice spoke up, and as a mask was placed over her mouth and nose, Lia realised she had no idea what they meant.

How was she meant to fight when it seemed like the war had been lost?

 **X**

Carisi paced back and forth, ignoring all of Olivia's attempts at comfort.

He didn't want to sit down, he didn't want to read some old magazine and he certainly didn't feel like a coffee.

All he wanted was his sister. His sister to be safe.

But now she was in a war zone, and he wasn't the one able to pull her out.

She had to do that on her own.

The nurse from the ER earlier came out an hour or so later and Carisi wasted no time in approaching her.

"What's the news."

"It's going relatively well considering her injuries."

"What does that mean?" He asked, annoyed.

"It means we're hopeful Lia will make a fairly complete recovery."

"But?"

"We came to the knowledge that Lia was 6 weeks pregnant. The fetus did not survive the attack. I'm sorry."

"She… She was pregnant?"

"I'm sorry. She will be in surgery for a few more hours. I'll come out again before the end and update you. You'll be able to see her in the ICU afterward."

He hardly acknowledged her leaving, and found himself in a chair, a hand pressed into his forehead.

Did Lia not know she was pregnant, or did she simply not trust him enough to tell him?

Why else would she ring Dan?

That tore him apart and it took everything in him not to fall to pieces right there on the spot.

But he couldn't, because he had to be there for his sister regardless. It wasn't about him, it was about Lia.

Olivia provided some good insight, and he really listened to her words despite his dazed state.

It was nearing 7pm when the nurse appeared, accompanied by a still gowned surgeon and he stood to greet them.

"Lia's out of surgery and is in the ICU. She made it through surgery, but she still has a long road ahead of her." The surgeon explained quickly. He'd seen enough broken families to know all they wanted was to see their loved ones.

"Piper will take you up there now. I'll be back around later to explain the extent of her injuries." He gave a nod to the nurse who eyed Carisi, and then gestured for him to follow her to the ICU.

Walking down the hallway, he could hardly breathe and for a moment he was reminded of the time all those months ago where he was visiting Lia at college.

That was the start of it. When he found out the true nature of Lia's relationship with Dan and when she made the decision to shut him out of it.

Now she was fighting for her life in a hospital bed. He would give anything for it to have ended up differently.

He never should have left her alone in his apartment. He should have been with her, all of this time. He should have helped her. Now it was beyond that.

There was nothing anyone could do or say that would make him feel any better about that, because he had failed and Lia wasn't to blame for that, he was.

"Here we are." Piper finally stopped in front of one of the rooms. The glass wall that faced the nurses station allowed him to see his sister and the way she looked so broken made him pause, his breath hitched in his throat.

"Okay, detective?" She checked and at his nod she continued, "Lia may not wake up for a few more hours yet. You stay as long as you want. We'll be in and out checking up on her. Dr. Paul will come by later this evening to talk to you and check Lia. If you need anything, just let us know." She smiled, and stepped out of the way to allow Carisi through the sliding door into Lia's room.

Instantly he noticed the slow, steady beeping of the heart monitor that told him his sister was very much alive. The sterile, antiseptic smell however, told him that it was only just so.

He took his place in the chair beside her bed and after a moment of simply staring at his sister, he carefully took her hand in his.

It was 45 minutes later that Olivia appeared at the door, and he stood, moving over to talk to her.

"I just wished she'd have talked to me." He muttered as he stepped into the hallway.

Olivia nodded understandingly. "I know. But you can't blame yourself. Perhaps Lia just wasn't ready for you to know yet. She may not have come to terms with it herself."

It was Carisi's turn to nod and knowing how drained he was Olivia continued with what she'd come to say. "I was on the phone with Tucker. You'll need to talk to IAB, tomorrow afternoon. He was certain it wouldn't take long."

"Great thank you." The slight hint of sarcasm was noted and she gave a small nod.

"Amanda called your parents just before and they said they were on their way."

"I didn't even think…"

"It's okay, it's taken care of. Just go be with your sister. Keep in touch and some of us will come by in the morning."

"Thanks Liv."

"Don't mention it." She gave him a comforting smile, before turning and leaving back down the hall.

He watched her leave before returning into the ICU room. Lia's almost expressionless face gave him peace of mind, knowing that she wasn't feeling too much pain.

This time when he took his place bedside, he felt the need to speak, words of comfort to his sister at least until Dr. Paul showed up looking about as tired as Carisi felt.

He'd talked to families of trauma victims all the time, and he seemed to have a gift about doing so. All Carisi wanted to know however, was if his sister was going to be okay.

"We're hopeful that she will make a full physical recovery." He finished after all the medical jargon that Carisi couldn't quite wrap his head around right then.

Dr. Paul checked Lia's vitals and adjusted her IV line before signing something off in her chart, shaking Carisi's hand and leaving the room.

Lia's eyes finally began to flutter open a few hours later and it was the twitch of her fingers around Carisi's hand that brought him out of his snooze.

She felt surreal, like she could feel everything and nothing at the same time and she winced and gave a tiny hiss of pain as she became aware of her surroundings.

"What, where am I?" She finally mumbled after finding her voice and didn't miss the concerned expression on her brothers face.

"Lia, you're in the hospital. You don't remember any of what happened?"

She went silent and eventually looked at him with teary eyes. "No. I don't remember. But it hurts. It hurts."

Upon calling her in, the nurse, Piper firstly administrated more pain meds, and then went about checking Lia over, including checking her surgical site and making her follow a small torch with her eyes.

Carisi sat by her side as Piper talked her through everything that happened, minus loosing the baby.

As he watched her come to terms with what Dan had done to her, he knew bringing up the fact he would have been more than happy to help with the baby would simply make Lia feel worse.

"Wait a minute." Lia's voice caught him of guard. "I was… Pregnant. I remember. I was." She stammered and Piper met Carisi's eye before giving a sad sigh.

"I'm so sorry Lia." Was all she had to say before Lia promptly burst into tears, and that was what really reminded Carisi of how young she was. She had always seemed so mature for her age, it was easy to forget that really she was his baby sister.

"I'll leave you two alone." Piper said slowly before moving out of the room, leaving brother and sister together. It was obvious even to her how close the two were. It was the sort of relationship that every parents simply wills their children to have.

"What happened to Dan?" Lia managed between quiet sobs and he looked down.

"He's dead." He spoke flatly and was caught of guard by the laugh Lia gave.

"I'm glad." She whispered and suddenly he didn't seem to matter anymore.

He was gone and she was here. Some might like to call it fate.

To Lia, it was everything and at that point in time with her in hospital broken and bruised, she didn't think she would ever fully recover from that.

For once she thought that maybe she could try.

"I promised I'd bring you home Lia."

It was then she realised, that home didn't have to mean four walls and that sometimes home was a person, your person.

With a sigh, she pulled her brother into a hug. "Thank you." Lia whispered.

She would be okay.

Lia was broken into a thousand pieces and what some might call a victim, but she was okay. Somehow, she would make it through that.

 **Okay so I found it a bit tricky to write the ending but here it is.**

 **I'll definitely miss writing this!**

 **Hope you've enjoyed reading as much as I've loved writing it.**

 **Let me know if you're interested in an sequel of some kind.**

 **Much love,**

 **Liv x**


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